AITA for being mad my girlfriend took my keys?

A Reddit user shares a disagreement with his girlfriend after she took his keys without asking. The couple, who have been together for 8 months, got into an argument when the girlfriend took his keychain to buy breakfast while he was asleep.

The user felt that his privacy was violated by her taking the keys without permission, while she thought it was a thoughtful gesture. The situation escalated, and he asked her to leave, but now she’s not responding to his attempts to reconcile.

His roommate believes he overreacted, but the user still feels his privacy was compromised.
To read more about this situation and the ensuing conflict, check out the original story below…

‘ AITA for being mad my girlfriend took my keys?’

My lovely girlfriend and I have been together for 8 months. She slept over at my place last night, and in the morning she woke me up saying she had went out and brought back a couple of lattes and pastries from a coffee shop around the corner from my apartment for breakfast.

My issue with this is that my apartment has a two factor entry, first my student ID to scan in and then my key to get back into the apartment (it auto locks).

I asked her how she was able to get back into the apartment and she said that she grabbed my keychain (which has my ID on it in a wallet type thing) before heading out to buy us breakfast so she would be able to get back in.

I told her that I didn’t appreciate her violating my privacy like that, and she got upset, saying that she was just trying to do something nice for me. We started to fight about it and I ended up asking her to leave.

Since then, she hasn’t answered any of my texts or calls. When I told my roommate about this he said that I was the a**hole because she did something thoughtful for me and I yelled at her about it.

I think she was violating my privacy by stealing my keys. AITA?
Edit: I thought it was weird that she took my keys without asking, they could have gotten stolen or something while she was out, I get that she was being nice but why couldn’t she have asked??

Edit 2: and no she still hasn’t responded to me
Edit: I’m at work now obsessing but I know that I screwed up. I had a bad experience with privacy in my last relationship and i guess I’m projecting or something.

And no, my girlfriend hasn’t responded to any of my voicemails or texts besides sending back money I tried to send her for the breakfast last night but she might not be awake yet, it’s early in my time zone

Final edit because people keep messaging me: long story short, she texted me and we met for coffee earlier this afternoon. I brought her flowers and apologized for being insane. We had a long talk about my privacy issues from my last relationship.

She chose not to break up with me, she will be getting lots of dates and back rubs in the future.
Also, I am already in therapy but thanks for suggesting it

Check out how the community responded:

Abblz −  Oh man! I hope this red flag is enough of a warning for her.. Edit: YTA

Blackstar1401 −YTA. Your ex girlfriend was being nice. It’s not like she stole them to make copies. She just wanted to be nice

sorrowskilledthefear −  YTA- invading your privacy?
She was already at your place…taking your keys literally to DO A NICE THING isnt invading your privacy.

She didnt go into your porn folder on your computer to make sure she could get back into the room lmao. She took your keys and bought you food.. What a baby.

[Reddit User] −  Very thoughtful of you to show her your true colours before she gets too invested into the relationship.
Poor girl.

CurrentGround −  YTA. She didn’t steal your keys.

ItalianMothMan −  She’s your girlfriend, and she can’t even use your keys to get in and out of the building with out you kicking her out? YTA

anono92466 −  YTA. And how is that “violating your privacy?” What info does she know about you after this egregious violation? Dude… you’ve been dating for 8 months.. she isn’t a stranger.

My guess… she’s not responding because she is done. Not only are YTA, you insulted her by suggesting she was somehow doing something shady by trying to do something nice.

emanresuelbaliavayna −  YTA. She didn’t steal anything. She brought your keys with her so she could get back in. She was trying to be thoughtful. If you’re not comfortable with her using your keys for some reason, then say so.

But accusing her of stealing from you and violating your privacy and then kicking her out when she was just trying to do something nice for you is a huge overreaction and definitely makes you TA.

evilpenguin22 −  YTA she didn’t steal your keys, she bought you breakfast

hmu92485 −  Ok so let me make sure I’m understanding—
You trust her enough to sleep with her and let her sleep in your home overnight but you aren’t cool with her taking your keys so she can get back in to your house because she left to get you breakfast?

You my friend are most certainly the a**hole. She probably didn’t want to wake you and surprise you with breakfast.. YTA.

Do you think the user’s reaction was justified given his concerns about privacy, or did he overreact to a simple gesture of kindness? How would you handle a situation where boundaries are unintentionally crossed by a partner?
Share your thoughts below!