AITA for asking my parents what they have done for me and not for my brother?

The hustle and bustle of everyday life can sometimes create situations where it’s hard to figure out who’s truly getting the care and support they need. In this particular story, a young teenager finds himself wondering whether his parents have ever really taken the time to consider his needs. It’s a poignant problem: What happens when attention naturally shifts to the family member who requires special care?

Yet, beneath the surface is a wave of emotion—frustration, loneliness, even a tinge of resentment. You can almost picture the household’s busy energy, centered on a beloved yet heavily dependent sibling, while our narrator stands by with unanswered questions and a growing sense of neglect. The urgency of his feelings propels the story forward, urging us to dig deeper.

‘ AITA for asking my parents what they have done for me and not for my brother?’

Before we delve into the heart of this dilemma, let’s look at the raw story in its own words. The original post is shared here, unfiltered and honest:

Letting your parents know how you feel can be a monumental challenge, especially when their energy is pulled in multiple directions. This situation underscores a classic family dynamic: balancing the needs of one child with critical care requirements while ensuring the other child’s emotional well-being. According to some family psychologists, sibling relationships in high-stress environments can create a sense of invisibility in the child who appears more self-sufficient.

Family therapy expert Dr. Alicia H. Clark explains in an article on Psychology Today that children often internalize such neglect as an indication they must handle life’s issues independently. She notes, “When a child’s emotional needs are overshadowed by a sibling’s urgent requirements, feelings of resentment and self-doubt can quickly accumulate.” Dr. Clark’s observation resonates here: the lack of parental engagement leaves our narrator feeling unseen and unheard.

The broader issue extends beyond a single family. Many parents with a child who needs constant medical attention end up caught in a web of exhaustion and stress. In fact, a 2017 report by the National Survey of Children’s Health indicates that families caring for children with special needs frequently experience higher rates of emotional burnouts. With so much of their time devoted to care, it’s easy for them to overlook the older or more independent sibling’s emotional landscape.

So, what’s the solution? First, acknowledging the teen’s frustration can foster healing. Encouraging open dialogues—where each person, including the sibling, has a platform to express themselves—can make a significant difference. Dr. Clark also suggests seeking community or extended-family support systems that can share responsibilities, allowing parents the breathing room to invest some time in every child. By embracing these strategies, the teen may find solace in knowing that his experiences and aspirations matter.

Here’s how people reacted to the post:

Sometimes the freshest insights come from candid voices. Here are some hot takes from the Reddit community—equal parts blunt and empathetic:

These varied reactions reflect society’s broader perspective: while many empathize with the complexity of caring for a disabled child, they also highlight a vital truth—that no child should ever feel left in the shadows.

Balancing compassion for a special-needs child with the emotional needs of a sibling is no small feat. Yet ignoring one child’s feelings can lead to lasting tension and heartbreak. How do you think families in this situation should navigate these challenges? What would you do if you found yourself in a similar situation? Join the discussion and share your personal stories—every voice matters.