AITA – Family movie misunderstanding
A Reddit user shared a story about a mix-up over buying movie tickets for a family outing, which escalated into a heated disagreement with her husband.
She believed her mother-in-law’s offer to “treat” them meant the MIL would purchase the tickets, but her husband disagreed, leading to accusations and tension. Read the full story below.
‘ AITA – Family movie misunderstanding ‘
My husband told me his mother texted him and told him she wanted to take us all (me, hubs and daughter) to see Moana when it comes out in theater. He left it up to me to contact her and coordinate so I did.
I let her know it doesn’t come out until the end of the month and sent her a link to purchase tickets for a date and time at a theater and asked if there as good to which she replied yes, we will treat and I said thank you. I assumed this meant she was going to go online and buy the ticket.
Fast forward to tonight my husband asked if I confirmed his mother purchased the tickets to which I responded that I assumed she had but he said I should confirm. So I messaged her asking if she had and she said no, she thought I was buying them and she would reimburse me.
No worries, I told her that showing was sold out and I would find something else. My husband freaked out at me saying it was all my fault for assuming she would get the tickets and that it was clearly me who was supposed to get them and that I was doing all of this because I didn’t like his mom.
I told him that was definitely not clear to me and that I felt he was g**lighting me and trying to make me feel bad. After I had already found another theater with another showing that could accommodate us all and bought tickets, he still thought I was in the wrong and being a b**ch.
It’s the fact that my husband thinks I am in the wrong completely here and I feel completely gaslit by him. I say it was a misunderstanding and it was fine. If anything he owes me an apology for thinking so badly of me. What do you think, AITA for thinking my MIL saying the movie tickets were her treat meant she was going to buy the tickets?
Here’s the feedback from the Reddit community:
Humble-Answer1863 − Why couldn’t he have coordinated it with his own mother? Instead he acts like an AH over a misunderstanding
EsmeWeatherwax7a − He “freaked out” and called you a b**ch because you and his mother had a cordial interaction and a slight misunderstanding, and you had to go to a different showing of a Disney movie as a result? Is he always like this? Yikes.
NTA, I would have assumed the same thing you did, but regardless of that it was just an innocent mistake. Your bigger problem is your husband’s reaction, and I hope he doesn’t normally come in this hot for the little issues that crop up in anyone’s life.
Fragrant-Customer913 − Why didn’t he coordinate with his mom and handle purchasing the tickets? This all could have been avoided had he done that.
k23_k23 − NTA. You are right, your husband is the AH – in the future REFUSE to take over and let HIM coordinate with his mom.
Clean_Factor9673 − NTA. If MIL offered to take you to the movie she needs to buy the tickets
Swimminginthestorm − Is MIL upset? Either way, NTA. He needs to apologize. I’m just trying to figure out why he’s even mad.
Apprehensive-Care20z − NTA. go get tickets for another showing. Problem solved! First, does anyone in the family ever talk to each other. Not a ‘how you doing, looking forward to the movie next week’. ‘hey muana got great reviews’, not a ‘were you able to get tickets to that showing?’
Didn’t MIL talk to you about paying you, at all, ever? Like, say she would bring cash to the movie and pay you.
However, you husband is the a**hole, wtf. I’m laughing out loud at how angry he is that he missed Muana. ha ha. Something else is going on here.
tarbearjean − NTA but your husband is. First of all why was it up to YOU to communicate with HIS mother about all of this? Second of all he wholly overreacted and was incredibly rude to you. Does he always treat you like this over nothing?
Fearless_Lychee_6050 − So his mother texts saying she’d like to take you to the movies, but then YOU have to coordinate with her, YOU have to pick the date, time, and place, and YOU have to actually purchase the tickets, and all your MIL is doing is forking over some cash after the fact?
Then your husband is being a massive d**k to you over a kids movie and a minor miscommunication? Which again, YOU did all of the legwork to fix??? You need to have a come to Jesus talk with your husband because you cannot let him disrespect you like this. NTA
PanicAtTheGaslight − NTA. Why did he “leave it up to you”? It’s HIS mother. Why didn’t HE coordinate with her, since she contacted HIM and surely HE can handle buying the damn tickets?. Your husband sucks!
Do you think the Redditor misunderstood her MIL’s intentions, or was her husband overreacting? How should families handle communication in situations like this? Share your perspective and experiences in the comments below!
If you read it again slowly it says the husband mother texted him and said she wanted to take them all to see moana its on the husbands mother sort it not the daughter in law
So your mother in law, a caoable adult, contacted her son, another capable adult, to offer to take you all out, but somehow it is your responsibility to arrange it all, and your fault when your mother in law also allowed the purchasing to also become your responsibility but didn’t even tell you so (though it sounds like a genuine misunderstanding so I’m researching judgement on her).
First, you’re not a mind reader so this was a misunderstanding and not worthy of blame. Second, you’re also not a servant to your husband or mother in law so I would assert a new boundary of not arranging things other grown adults suggest, and next time it happens just say, with your most casually innocent face ‘That sounds like a great idea! Let me know the date and time when youve booked it and we will see you there!. If you are outright asked to do it, say no – don’t even offer help in the form of booking links or prices. Let them know that the last experience left you feeling upset, disrespected and unjustly blamed for a misunderstanding about a task that wasn’t yours in the first place, so you are not willing, at present, to take the risk that, despite your best efforts, you will end up being blamed and shouted at for something that you had no power over and, I’ll ssy it again, was not and should not have been your responsibility in the first place.
Finally, your husband sucks. Not only did he blame and shame you for a simple misunderstanding, but it was him who casually decided this was a job for you without asking if you wanted it.
Does he lack his limbs/sight/intelligence as if not what’s his excuse for a capable grown ass man not making the arrangements with HIS mum in the first place? I am particularly disturbed that his anger was, apparently, born specifically out of his conviction that you did it on purpose to spite his mum. You’ve got yourself a grade A mama’s boy there. He doesn’t have your back because he’s too busy having his mum’s back and until he can see that too you will ALWAYS be second fiddle to her. If you don’t want your mother in law to have the final say over your whole life then run, run far away, now. She might be lovely but if you disagree on major issues like child rearing practices, will you be ‘allowed’ to raise your children how you want if your mother in law wants it different? Will your husband back you up or is it his mum who will have final say? I would think long and hard about whether you can live with this forever if he doesn’t change his attitude. x