I [30F] just found out my husband [32M] might be the father of my best friend’s [34F] child [4F]. What the hell do I do now?

A Reddit user shares a devastating revelation: her husband may be the father of her best friend’s 4-year-old child and unborn baby. The shocking news came from the best friend’s husband, who claims to have evidence of a long-term affair. Now, the user is grappling with the betrayal, her own pregnancy, and the uncertainty of her future. She’s unsure whether to confront her husband, meet with the other husband for more evidence, or figure out her next steps.

‘ I [30F] just found out my husband [32M] might be the father of my best friend’s [34F] child [4F]. What the hell do I do now?’

Yesterday I received a call from my best friend’s (Amy) husband (Paul) claiming my husband was the father of her four-year-old daughter (Kim). He said they got into an argument and she blurted out that Kim isn’t his daughter and that Kim regularly spends time with her real dad (my husband). He snooped and found out her dad was my husband. I’m so shocked and angry, I don’t know what to do.

Paul claims he has evidence of their ongoing long-term affair and he would like to meet up with me to show me it. I don’t know if I should go. (edit: he wants me to meet him alone at his house) A part of me wishes he’d never told me. I asked him to send me something over text first because I honestly didn’t believe him and he sent me a blurry video of Amy hav*g *** with someone. She was moaning my husband’s name, but you couldn’t really tell if it was him in it because it was so dark. He sent me a few texts between them too, I wish I could unread them. I feel numb and sick.

I haven’t confronted my husband yet, I don’t even have the energy to do that. He noticed something was off when he got home and asked me if I was okay, but I just shrugged it off and told him I was going to sleep. He decided to work from home today because he was worried I wasn’t feeling well. I wish he hadn’t.

To make things worse me and Amy are both pregnant. I’m 5 months and she’s 7 months. Paul claims that baby is also my husband’s. He said he was planning to sue my husband for all of the money he spent raising his child and Amy was planning to put him on child support. He said he was warning me in advance so I could apply before her. They’re going to get a divorce.

I just can’t believe he would do this. I just keep hoping Paul will text me saying it was all a joke. Amy keeps texting me telling me she’s sorry, I’ve ignored her so far but I want to rage at her. I don’t know what I’m going to do if we get a divorce. I don’t think I can raise my baby alone. I feel dumb for posting this but I have no idea what I should do… Shall I just pretend I don’t know?

TL;DR – My best friend’s husband claims heir four-year is my husband’s and that the baby she is currently pregnant with is also his. I’m also pregnant. I haven’t confronted him. What do I do now?. 

These are the responses from Reddit users:

YouKnowYourCrazy −  1. Breathe. Deep deep breath.
2. Save everything you have that could be considered evidence. Consider meeting with the husband but ask him not to talk to your husband yet.

3. Don’t confront your husband yet. Discuss with a lawyer before you do anything. Find out what your options are. But, consider that the affair partner is likely going to tell him you know, sooner rather than later, so do #3 & #4 now, like right now.
4. Research and document what you have in bank accounts and assets. If he knows you know, he may start moving/hiding things. Don’t take anything, just assess.

5. Find a therapist. This isn’t going to be easy, you’ll need support.
6. Once you have your ducks in a row, decide next steps.

This sucks, OP, but it’s real, so you need to act. If not for you, for your baby. I’m so sorry. Edit: thank you for all the awards and upvotes! I hope my advice helps OP; my heart hurts for her.

gotanysparechang33 −  So if Amy already knows Paul told you she didn’t let your husband know the cats out of the bag? Did Amy admit that the child is your husband’s and that she was indeed having an affair with your husband or is she only apologizing because her husband is involving you in their divorce? I’m not sure how your husband could not know that Paul has told you along with Amy in that case.

nowaytostop −  She probably tipped him off already. That’s why he stayed home. You need to gather evidence and prepare for the worst.

Mycateatsmoney −  Dna test.

OwlPilot −  Based on your update, if it wasn’t your husband why was she texting you saying sorry? Like sorry for the confusion? I don’t get it.

[Reddit User] −  Paul is trying to give you a heads up so that your finances don’t get caught up in his lawsuit. You have proof he cheated, with or without DNA, so file for divorce and protect yourself and get what you need to get for your baby.

ShimmeringNothing −  Denial isn’t an option, OP. Things are going to happen even if you don’t want to face them (e.g. your husband being sued). I saw here on reddit that child support can be first-come-first-served, in that the person who applies first tends to get more. You need to act fast if you’re going to act. The fact Amy has texted you apologizing pretty much confirms that your husband’s been having an affair with her IMO.

Soup__Sucker −  Do not pretend you do not know. You’re enabling your POS husband’s behavior. DNA test first and foremost. I don’t think Amy’s husband is playing games. He’s rightfully pissed and you should be too. Take his advice. Get out before it’s too late. Your husband has made it clear you are not his everything. Also you can’t post this to Reddit without a follow-up.

0chrononaut0 −  Absolutely do not meet Paul anywhere that isn’t in public. I don’t know why but the fact he won’t meet you in public and wants you to come alone to his house sounds suuuuuper fuckin sketchy.

Gryffenne −  Amy keeps texting me telling me she’s sorry. ​ She just keeps texting me stuff like “I’m so sorry” “please answer the phone” “can we talk about it” “please don’t be angry” “forgive me please” “I can explain”. From the Update:

I spoke to Amy. Turns out my husband isn’t the person she’s been having an affair with. When she told Paul he just assumed it had to be my husband because of the name. She said he went berserk, and she was too scared to correct him. Her and Kim are safe at her mother’s house. I told her about him wanting me to come to their house and she warned me not to so. I would NOT trust Amy right now. Seriously, convenient that her side piece has the same name as your husband. It could be that she is trying to claim Child Support before you do. Lawyer up and demand DNA tests.