WIBTA if I told my family that our “secret family recipe” came from the side of a can?

A Reddit user reflects on their family’s long-held “secret family fudge recipe” tradition, only to discover it originated from the side of an evaporated milk can. The user, who was previously scolded for memorizing the recipe “early,” is now debating whether to reveal the recipe’s true origins.

Sharing this information might humorously debunk the myth but could also upset family members who cherish the tradition. For the full context and background, read the post below.

‘ WIBTA if I told my family that our “secret family recipe” came from the side of a can?’

Growing up every year around the holidays my mom would make fudge. The story was this amazing fudge recipe came from her grandma who snagged it from a famous candy maker. My mom didn’t get the recipe until she was an adult and we were always told that we couldn’t have it until we were 30.

In my late teens my mom asked me to help make the fudge with her a few times. The recipe is very simple and this was all the exposure I needed to memorize it. I’ve never once needed to write the recipe down. It came out that I had the recipe early and my mom and her mom were both outraged.

I was given many warnings against sharing family secrets and told they were disappointed at my sneaking around them. I’ve never shared the recipe with anyone besides my brother and sister. I don’t have the same feelings about recipe hoarding, but I followed tradition.

However even now, 15ish years later, I’ll get comments about how they don’t entirely trust me since I came by the recipe dishonestly. Tonight I was reading an article about a chef doing research on secret family recipes for pickled herring. He managed to get copies of hundreds of recipes-200 of them were identical.

He traced them back to a cookbook from the 1960s. This got me thinking about our family recipe. After not much googling at all I found “our” exact recipe on the website for an evaporated milk company. They apparently have also printed the recipe on cans over the years. This leads me to believe that either my grandma or her mother actually got the recipe from a can and lied about it’s origin.

I think this is hilarious and want to share the information. We’ve been so secretive about a recipe that’s in public domain! There’s really no reason to hoard it anymore.
Would I be the a**hole if I shared this knowledge with my mom?

Here’s what people had to say to OP:

[Reddit User] −  …Can you find a can of the recipe somewhere and give her one as a pre-christmas gift? bats eyelashesIt is one thing to treasure a recipe. It’s another thing to imply you’re dishonest and/or untrustworthy. nAlso, what do I google to find this recipe? ;). Edit: Thanks for the silver!

AnorhiDemarche −  Dude, your own mother is going off at you for “learning the recipe dishonestly”when she f**king asked you to help her with it and basically taught you like it’s somehow your fault that you retain information, probably to avoid anger on her for sharing it with you in the first place even though she only needed help making fudge.

Do you really think that showing them that their secret recipe isn’t really the awesome story they were told is going to have a good impact on your life? Like really when you really really think about it, is this a good idea for your sanity or will you just be adding more fuel to the fire of crazy?

[Reddit User] −  NTA. I’ve always thought “secret family recipes” were some old style gatekeeping b**lshit. Share the recipe and let everyone enjoy some tasty fudge. Who cares if it came from a can or the world’s leading fudge expert? Food is an art. Just because everyone has the recipe doesn’t mean they’ll make it the same.

s3x_p3ac3 −  This is the episode of friends when phoebe found out her dead grandmas secret cookie recipe was the one on the back of the nestle tollhouse chocolate chip bag 😅
“This is why you’re burning in hell!” NTA. Burst some bubbles

Goldskilt −  NTA Saw the heading and just knew it was going to be the carnation fudge recipe. It is a good recipe! I don’t understand how they asked for your help making the fudge, then be mad that you know the recipe.

I think you should make some for this Christmas, wait for someone to make a comment and reply “oh no, I can’t be trusted with the family recipe, so I used this one” and whip out a can of carnation.

Argent_Jinx −  I don’t think you are an a**hole and I don’t think you would be an a**hole. But the fact is that recipe is really special to them regardless of it’s origins. So a**hole or not I think it will likely hurt their feelings at least a little bit, but they’ll probably get over it.

It’s also important to remember that you can never unsay anything. So I guess the question is, do you want to ruin something really special for them for no real reason? You gain nothing by telling them. So NTA either way.

valaranias −  INFO – I make this fudge. The recipe isn’t on the side of a can, it’s on the side of nearly EVERY can during Christmas time. How has anyone never seen it before?!

Luna8586 −  The first thing I think of with this is Friends when Phoebe thinks her grandma had this secret cookie recipe when it was actually from Nestle Tollhouse. Monica : Well, I mean, what about friends of your grandmother’s – wouldn’t they have the recipe?

Phoebe : Well, y’know, I may have relatives in France who would know. My grandmother said she got the recipe from her grandmother, Nesele Toulouse.. Monica : What was her name?. Phoebe : Nesele Toulouse.. Monica : NESTLE TOLLHOUSE? Phoebe : Oh, you Americans always butcher the French language!

z1lard −  NTA But it would be funny to tell everybody else in the family except your mum and grandma