AITA for leaving the restaurant before my boyfriend’s family arrived after I was told that I was going to pay for their meals?

A Redditor shared a shocking story about her boyfriend’s expectations during a dinner outing. After dating for only five months, her boyfriend insisted she cover the bill for both him and his parents — without warning. When she refused, he tried to guilt her into paying, but instead, she chose to leave the restaurant before his family arrived. Now, he’s upset and demanding an apology, accusing her of acting like his ex. Was she right to walk out, or did she overreact? Read the full story below!

‘ AITA for leaving the restaurant before my boyfriend’s family arrived after I was told that I was going to pay for their meals?’

I (f29) have been dating my boyfriend (m35) ‘Ricky’ for 5 months. He’s divorced but hates this word and goes with the word “divorcee” instead since the first one makes it sound like he was “dumped” when it was him who initiated it.

Anyways, He always go on long rants about his exes and say stuff like “I hope you don’t have this awful habit my ex has” or “hope you like XYZ cause my ex didn’t” and the list goes on. I found a 2nd job recently and he’s been having me pay every time we go out. When I protest he’d say he’s going through a rough patch and is seeing how much help I cam offer.

Last night he invited his family to join us for dinner. We got to the restaurant first. He asked me if I “brought” enough momey, I said why and he told me that he told his parents that I’d pay for their meals. I said why would I and he went on about his parents going through a rough patch just like him.

I said “I’m sorry this can’t be a coincidence!” he asked what I meant and I told him that I would not be paying. He insisted, I refused and said no. He then leaned back and said “well, you’re here, so not much of a choice you have anyway” while laughing like it was funny. I silently got up, took my phone and purse and walked right out. He was shocked he started shouting after me to stop and wait but I didn’t.

I went home and he called me enraged saying that I did a horrible thing walking out on him and his parents, while I could’ve just paid. I told him that their unfortunate financial situation isn’t my problem and that I wasn’t obligated to pay for their food. If they couldn’t pay for their meals, then they should not go out.

He got offended and said and I qoute “you’re making money a priority just like my ex did” then went on about how disrespectful my attitude was and how I made him look small infront of his parents and forced him to lie about why I wasn’t there when they came.

We’ve been going back an forth about it til now. He’s mad and is refusing to speak to me til I apologize. AITA? I feel bad because his parents are lovely and I been doing my best to keep a good relationship with them.

Here’s what the community had to contribute:

33ayin −  OMG – GIRL RUN!!!! This is NOT a man you want or need in your life! Go, go, go and don’t look back – like ever!! NTA by a long shot

GamesCatsComics −  Divorcee vs Divorced – Red Flag. Ranting about his ex on repeat – Red Flag. Expecting you to pay for everything – Red Flag. “Seeing how much help I can offer” – Red Flag. Expecting you to pay for his parents, and not warning you ahead of time – Red Flag. Comparing you to an ex because you don’t want to pay for his family – Red Flag. This dude is full of red flags. it’s time to run. NTA.

WhiteJadedButterfly −  NTA, you’re together for only 5 months and he’s pulling this s**t. Time to cut your losses! Next!

Forward_Squirrel8879 −  NTA – Why on earth are you dating this AH?

thedarkerhour −  NTA. Ohhh the audacity is strong with this one and the red flags are waving. Girl, just leave his ass. If he expected you to pay for him and his parents once, chances are, he’ll do it again. Like you said, their financial issues aren’t your problem.

stannenb −  INFO: Why is this man your boyfriend?

papercrowns- −  NTA. There’s a reason why he’s divorced. So many red flags in this post.

1st : refusing to say divorce bc it looks like he was dumped

2nd : treating you like a personal ATM

3rd : wanting to make you his parents’ ATM

Do yourself a favor and break up with him. He’s clearly a gold digger. Like seriously don’t invite your parents to eat out when u dont have money and make ur partner pay. That’s just disgusting.

anonthrow_away88 −  NTA. Boyfriend is clearly using you. Glad you stood your ground. Also he probably did not initiate his own divorce… just a hunch lol

jwjnthrowawaykfeiofj −  NTA but who cares how the deck chairs are arranged? The ship is headed toward an iceberg.

anyanka814 −  Was it an Italian restaurant? I see marinara flags.. NTA. DTMFA

Do you think the Redditor was justified in leaving the restaurant when faced with unfair expectations, or should she have handled the situation differently? How would you react if a partner expected you to pay for their family without notice? Share your thoughts in the comments below!