AITA for giving my child a “culturally inappropriate” name?

A Reddit user, a Black man who grew up in the foster system, shared how he named his newborn son Dimitri Petrovitch Williams to honor an elderly Russian man who had a significant impact on his upbringing. While he and his wife love the name, they’ve faced backlash from family and friends who feel the name is “culturally inappropriate” and doesn’t reflect their heritage.

The user stands by his decision, believing the name honors a man who was like a father to him. Was this a meaningful tribute, or should he have chosen a name more aligned with his culture? Read the full story below and share your thoughts.

‘ AITA for giving my child a “culturally inappropriate” name?’

I am black, and my wife is also black. I spent my most of my childhood in the foster system, but for a good part of it I was taken care of by an elderly Russian gentleman (we’ll call him Dimitri Petrovitch). While he never formally adopted me, he played a major role in my upbringing, and I am very grateful for all that he has done for me. Unfortunately, he passed away many years ago, and he never had any children.

Fast forward to today, my wife and I recently had a son, and to honor the memory of my mentor, I decided (with my wife’s approval) to name my kid Dimitri Petrovitch Williams. Williams being my last name, and Petrovitch being my son’s middle name.

However, it seems like it’s only my wife and I who likes this name, as her extended family has been quite upset over it, saying things like “What kinda name is Dimitri?”, or “You ain’t white, you ain’t Russian, why did you give your son such as a white name.”

It’s true that there’s no part of me that’s Russian (I an barely speak Russian), but I feel like he’s been such a big part of my upbringing that I had to honor him somehow. I confided in my friends too, and they said something along the lines of “You a black man and you gotta be proud of your own culture. You gave your son an identity that he’s not even a part of, he’s gonna have a hard time in school with that name.”

So my wife’s family aren’t happy with our decision, and it seems like my friends don’t really have my back either. I’m keeping the name that’s for sure, but should I have reconsidered? Maybe I could’ve honored my mentor in another way?

Let’s dive into the reactions from Reddit:

Kineth −  Black guy here. NTA. Tell her family to shut the f**k up.

EDIT: Wow, thank you all so much for my 1st through 23d reddit gold!

EDIT2: I’m so surprised and thankful for all the reddit silver and gold I’ve received. Don’t ever forget to tell someone to shut the f**k up when they need to hear it.

tuppensforRedd −  Nta I am glad I’m not the only one- my friend said, “you’re white, your wife is Hispanic, and you gave your son a black name” it’s actually Omar, so we get a lot of comments about the Arabic name too. Be proud my friend, you honor a great man and that is all a name has to be. If your son turn out like him, you would be happy?

Jeanne_Hollow −  Def NTA. You honored an honorable man who helped shape and form your life, morals, ethics. And also: IT’S YOUR CHILD. NAME THEM WHATEVER YOU DEEM APPROPRIATE. Kanye named his children what again? 🤓😉

Hedgiwithapen −  For what it’s worth, growing up I knew two boys named Dimitri, and both of them were black. I know that was likely a placeholder name, but still. The name may not be, broadly speaking, part of black culture*, but it’s part of your personal history and culture, and that matters, too. absolutely nta. * at least according to your in laws. I’m not black so I don’t want to overstep saying what is or is not black culture.

GoodQueenFluffenChop −  I’m a Hispanic with an Irish first name and my mom got the same grief mostly from my dad’s side. “You’re not white so why are you giving her that name?!” And “she’s not going to know her Hispanic roots now!”. Didn’t matter that my middle name is very Hispanic. NTA.

DeletedZombie −  NTA. It’s not culturally inappropriate. You found a name you like plain and simple. You didn’t do it for any other reason except pay respect to a man who helped you become the man you are.

It seems to me your families just want to make it a race related thing. Kinda the worst kind of racism. Plus you are showing a child that race or name doesn’t make you who you are, it’s about the positive influences you keep around you. With a story like that he’s got a lot of positive influence with him

XxOlive −  NTA. Dimitri is fine but skip the Petrovich. It’s not an actual middle name but like a nod to your father in the Russian culture. So Petrovich would mean “son of Peter or Petro” so this part just wouldn’t make sense in this context since you are his father.

hmmcn −  Uh 100% NTA. Your family and friends can name their kids what they want. Also, not that you need any reason at all, but you have a great tribute to an important person in your life.

maimee78 −  NTA, you didn’t give your son a “white” name or a “Russian” name, you named him after a man who was good to you and who loved you. I think that’s beautiful, and long as you and your wife are happy, that’s all that matters! Make sure your son knows where his name came from and why it’s important!

fgggr −  NTA. If people aren’t paying to raise your child, pay them no mind. He’s *your* kid.

Do you think the user was right to honor someone who shaped his life, even if the name doesn’t reflect his cultural background? Or should parents prioritize names that connect more closely with their heritage? How would you navigate a situation where family disapproves of your child’s name choice? Share your thoughts in the comments below!