AITA for high fiving a stranger who “humiliated” my bf?

A Reddit user shares a story of tension at the climbing gym when her boyfriend got upset after she high-fived a stranger. The incident occurred after her boyfriend, who is competitive and often belittles beginners, insulted a female climber for not holding the final hold of a V6 problem for five seconds. When the climber responded confidently, the Reddit user gave her a high five. This led to an argument when the boyfriend felt betrayed for not supporting him.

‘ AITA for high fiving a stranger who “humiliated” my bf?’

My bf and I go to the climbing gym regularly. He is really into it and I just started and climbing a few times a week. He’s stupidly competitive about it and quietly insults beginners who are not as good which makes me feel self conscious because I’m a beginner.

Last night we were at the climbing gym again and he was doing a V6. There was about 6 people taking turns on the problem probably because it’s a newly installed route and they were all failing. Then a girl came and flashed it. She made it so easy but at the end she didn’t hold the final hold for 5 seconds and my bf called her out after she was done.

Holding the last hold for 5 seconds is suppose to be the “right way” of finishing a route but she was doing it so easily she definitely could have. I think he was just being salty because she did it when he couldn’t. She laughed and told him he didn’t even start the problem correctly and walked off. I gave her a high five because she was walking towards me and did amazing at the problem (and knocked my bf off his high horse) and she was surprised but high fived me.

My bf turned to me and gave me a wtf look and wouldn’t talk to me the rest of the night. When we were heading home he ranted that I couldn’t be trusted to watch his back if I chose to take a stranger’s side over him. I was shocked that’s what he took from the climb and told him she shouldn’t have nitpicked her when she clearly climbed it correctly and he got mad and argued I was suppose to take his side over people I don’t even know.

See what others had to share with OP:

WholeAd2742 −  NTA. He was being petty, jealous, and a bit sexist calling her out. None of his business, and she told him off.

B0mbadil- −  NTA. Is your bf 10 years old?

BaconEggAndCheeseSPK −  NTA. If you boyfriend doesn’t like being called out on being a petty sore l**er, he should stop being a petty sore l**er.

itsMousy −  NTA. Your boyfriend sounds exhausting to be around.

Only-Engineering6586 −  NTA I’ve been climbing for many years, your bf’s attitude is the antithesis of most climbing gym communities. Climbing is a personal competition, not an outwards one. He should be focused on how to improve his own technique, strength, and mental game, and be inspired by climbers who he can learn from (not critiquing them to make himself feel better). It’s normal to cheer someone else on who has completed a hard send, V10, V6, or V0.

Their success says nothing about the different journey you’re on. His insulting of beginners is toxic and speaks to his own insecurities. While his attitude toward the V6 climber is bad, this particular pattern of behaviour is a worse red flag.
Also the rule is a controlled two seconds matched on a final hold, not 5 seconds. Welcome to climbing! If your bf continues to be weird like this, know that there are many other non-nit-picky and humble strong climbers to get to know..

thatsapaddlin2006 −  NTA. Toxic masculinity ruins the party yet again.

[Reddit User] −  NTA. He’s showing his true colors by laughing at people who aren’t as capable or experienced in what he is and that’s a sign he’s forgotten what it’s like. Props to you for putting him in his place. He needed that whether he realizes that, irrespective of if it came from you or not.

yandr001 −  NTA. Why are you with this guy?

[Reddit User] −  NTA. If BF thinks that being in a relationship means you have to agree with him and back him up when he’s an ass, that’s a bit of a concern – because that means whenever he’s an ass you’d have to be an ass too.
If you’d given him a public telling-off for being an ass, that would be different – but that’s not what you did.

Pleasant_desert −  Lol fragile male ego. NTA.