Update: AITA for not letting my best friend have her wedding on my property after being uninvited?

The user initially faced pressure from their best friend and her fiancé to allow their wedding to be held on the user’s property. However, after being uninvited and dealing with harassment from the fiancé’s family, the user decided to stand firm in not letting them use the property.

After a long conversation with the friend, Carla, and receiving an apology, Carla ultimately called things off. The user feels relieved that the drama is over but is distancing themselves from some friends who still think they are in the wrong.

‘ Update: AITA for not letting my best friend have her wedding on my property after being uninvited?’

Some stuff has happened recently and many of you have wanted an update on this. Appreciate the reassurance and understanding my decision when seems that many in this situation didn’t. I remained firm in my decision about not letting them use my property for their wedding.

Even if they changed their mind about inviting us which honestly I don’t care about anymore. Rick’s family (thanks to him) got a hold of my cell so that was more people I had to deal with. I put my foot down with Rick a few days ago and told him directly that I will go to the police and press charges for harassment (I have all the texts and calls documented).

Also had a very long talk with Carla about everything going on. She apologized for it all. And she knows it’s her own fault. Well she decided to be the one to call things off in the end. Some of my friends still seem to think it’s my fault and I’m taking some distance from them for a while.

And also from Carla after getting some confirmation on a few things that I needed to know. Whole thing is a mess. I’m only glad in the end that I didn’t give in to their demands and the constant bugging has stopped.. It still was a huge headache over the last few days and not the kind of drama I want back in my life.

Thank you to everyone who made me feel supported in this. It helped a lot not feeling like the only other person (aside from my wife), who thought their demand was insane and inappropriate.

Here’s the comments of Reddit users:

ollyator −  Wow… they ended up calling of their whole wedding??? Guess they both dodger a bullet just because you refused to be used. Good for you.

Katsurandom −  Stay strong man ~ Also beware of weird vendettas from rick’s family….

nytefox42 −  That whole situation sounded insane. I’m sorry you had to endure harassment from such entitled jerks over it and you’ve potentially lost a long time friend because of it, but I think you’re better off. Fiance especially sounds nuts. I can’t grasp being so insecure over learning that my SO has, GASP!, DATED OTHER PEOPLE BEFORE ME!!!

calculatingmacaw −  Sorry to hear about the whole situation OP, I hope you’re doing ok and not feeling bad at all because this absolutely isn’t on you in any way. I also hope you’re doing alright as I’ve just read your original post and seen the comment about Carla potentially still being in love with you, or at least was a little while ago.

Have you decided to talk to her about that or are you just leaving that part be? Either way, I hope you guys can still manage to be friends, and hopefully Rick will leave you well alone as unfortunately, this is partly on Carla for not telling him about your past relationship, and partly on him for being an obsessive and controlling nightmare. Good luck to all involved and keep us updated if anything more happens!

blacksteel15 −  Good for you. After reading the first post I can totally sympathize with Rick getting blindsided like that emotionally, but deciding that you owed him/them anything because *Carla* wasn’t honest was some next level mental gymastics.

The fact that he enabled a harrassment campaign against you for your very reasonable and completely foreseeable decision vindicates a lot of the judgements rendered in the first post. It sounds like neither of them is mature enough to handle a healthy marriage;

I hope they both walk away from this having learned something. It’s really s**tty that some people are blaming the situation on you (a position I’ve been in myself), and taking the space you need to reevaluate those relationships is the right decision.

DncgBbyGroot −  The whole story belongs in r/ChoosingBeggars. I will never understand some people’s level of entitlement.

babyma- −  Info!!!!! How does your wife feel about this whole situation? Does she have any ill feelings towards your ex?

LooseyLoo812 −  Goodness what a predicament you found yourself in. I feel you were just unfortunately caught in the crossfire of some underlying issues and insecurities, none of which you were to blame.

You’re right that it was an absurd thing for them to expect from you, and 100% Carla’s own fault for not being honest and upfront. I hope that things settle down for you. All the best and take care of you ♥️

LittleJessiePaper −  That friendship needs to come to a permanent end. Some relationships can evolve into a friendship, but she’s proven this one cant. I doubt it will take much for her to pull those feelings back up again. It’s not fair to your wife.

[Reddit User] −  I’m actually sorry for you because you seem the easiest target to blame for everything. Rick will continue to be as entitled as he’s shown to be because the people around him don’t have the guts to even breath his air for whatever reason. Glad Carla opened her eyes. It’ll always be easier to blame you than to have Rick change his behavior.