AITA for making fun of a girl for her dad’s 9/11 death?

A Redditor shares a tense exchange with a classmate whose father tragically died on 9/11. The classmate directed Islamophobic remarks at the Redditor, who is Muslim, leading to a heated and emotional confrontation. This story explores the fine line between standing up for oneself and escalating a sensitive situation. Read the full story below…

 

‘ AITA for making fun of a girl for her dad’s 9/11 death?’

I go to college in New York state. I am Muslim. I was very young when 9/11 happened, as were the rest of the people in my year. There’s a girl in one of my classes who’s father was in the World Trade Center. He died. Of course, this is very sad, and I pity the man, but not her. She’s extremely r**ist. She hates everyone who isn’t white or east asian.

But she especially hates Muslims due to her father’s passing. So of course, we don’t talk. But today, September 11, was the day she exploded. I was wearing a hijab. She told me I should take it off out of respect for the victims and that it was the equivalent of a hat. I said no. She said that “you Muslims did this, you need to take off the hijab to show respect.”

I obviously told her no. Then she went on a very long Islamophobic rant that I can’t entirely recall because this was hours ago. But I remember she concluded by saying that Islam took away her father, so she wants to take away Islam. (I’m still confused as to what she meant.)

She made a few comments towards me, and I went on my phone to de escalate. She made more comments, I kept ignoring her. But then she said “Yeah, you’re not responding because you know I’m right”. I don’t know why that set me off, but it did.

I told her “No, I’m just busy texting my DAD”. She left the room in tears. My classmates are saying that she was in the wrong, but what I said was unnecessarily cruel. Now, I don’t think I’m TA, bc she started it, all I did was finish it.. So, reddit, AITA??

Check out how the community responded:

FatherSonAndHolyFuck −  Can’t believe how much people are defending the r**ist one. So because her dad died she’s entitled to be r**ist when she’s having a bad day? No. I say NTA – she deserved it and if she does this again, I say bring up how dead her dad is again

[Reddit User] −  NTA. The crimes of people masquerading as muslims aren’t on you, a college kid. Live your life according to your convictions and move on. This girl needs therapy. You said what you said because she was being a r**ist and she backed you into a corner.

Asshole-Expert −  NTA The title had me mad but then I read the post. You did not make fun of her, you snapped at her in frustration at the way she was treating you. 9/11 was an awful day for all of America and it does stand to reason that today would especially hard for her since she lost her dad.

That said, it doesn’t mean you or anyone else should take her r**ist abuse today or any other day. You are not responsible for the acts of individuals who happen to share the same religion (and in this case it is a perversion of that religion anyway).

KiwiJammer −  NTA. Sick burn.

xeusifyy −  Her dad died 19 years ago and she’s still on this rant. She needs to get over herself and stop taking it out on others

ChapelGr3y −  I mean t e c h n i c a l l y this would be an E S H. Buuuuuut play stupid games win stupid prizes and throwing glass at stone houses and yadda yadda you get my meaning. Her grief and trauma about her dad are valid, and it is sad, but it’s no excuse for blatant racism and islamphobia.. Keep making the racists mad. NTA

AkilleezBomb −  NTA. Someone like that deserves to be put in their place. I was leaning towards ESH, but honestly f**k racists and xenophobes. She had it coming.

highwoodshady −  NTA. She’s old enough to know better. And if 9/11 is too traumatic for her, she should stay home and grieve not show up at school and rant at a random Muslim. No deserves to be denigrated.

fiveoclockmocktail −  NTA. It sucks she lost her dad but she can’t blame a billion people for it.

AzizOfArabia −  ESH. And I say it as a Muslim. Yes she’s a r**ist a**hole but you could’ve comeback a million different ways, that sentence you said was really uncalled for. She might be more of an a**hole than you, but that doesn’t justify what you did.

The situation highlights how trauma and prejudice can clash, leading to hurtful exchanges. While the Redditor responded to blatant racism, some might argue their comeback crossed a line. How do we balance self-defense with compassion in such emotionally charged moments? Share your perspective below!