AITA for leaving my wife by herself when she talks in a cringy manner

One person from Reddit shares their frustration with their wife’s behavior after becoming a mother. Ever since they had a baby, the wife has started speaking in a baby-like manner, using strange sounds and phrases even when talking to adults. After multiple requests to stop, the OP finally snapped and left their wife alone in a restaurant. Now, they wonder if their reaction was too extreme. Read the full story below.

‘ AITA for leaving my wife by herself when she talks in a cringy manner’

Ever since we(27) had a baby, my wife had been talking like a baby herself. Rather than teaching the baby to talk like a person, it’s as if my wife’s language has become baby-like. She would make noises in between conversations like “Bo-dee-bo-dee-chooop” and “Awowo-fwatata”, even when talking with adults. This is especially embarrassing when I am with her in public places, when she talks like that to complete strangers.

I have been telling nicely to her to not do that but she would just laugh it off, totally oblivious to how people around us stare whenever she talk like a baby. I have to point out that she is not in the spectrum, just a crazy new mum, in fact too crazy sometimes.

It was a day off for us when we have my parents babysitting the baby and we finally have some time by ourselves. We went out for dinner and she done it again, talking to the waiter, something like this: “Yippy thanks ya-ha-ha-hah. Owoyoyaya by the way can you give us an extra plate for this?”

Seeing how the waiter staring at her as if she is some kind of mentality challenged. I rolled my eyes and told her: “I am taking a break today and don’t need another baby who cannot even talk properly to look after. Please excuse me.” Then I left the restaurant without her. I don’t know what occurred to me but I probably shouldn’t have done that, but I guess it kinda just snapped. AITA?

Take a look at the comments from fellow users:

[Reddit User] −  ESH. Ditching her at a restaurant is unkind and a little dramatic. Talking to complete strangers in a baby voice is crazy and embarrassing. I don’t blame you at all for being frustrated and walking away, but she’s your wife, and sometimes people we love are imperfect. Try to react with kindness – she’s probably an exhausted walking zombie right now.

That being said, her behavior is weird and atypical for new moms. I’d have a sit-down conversation, and don’t let her laugh it off – if she starts brushing it off again, I’d say, “I’m not joking, this is strange behavior that’s really starting to worry me.” Make it crystal clear you’re disturbed. And if she persists, tell her you’re not interested in a date night until she can act like an adult.

Yay_Rabies −  INFO: How long ago did your wife have the baby and who is the primary caregiver of the baby? Because if your wife is basically at home with a newborn all the time and not getting enough adult interaction that speaks to a bigger problem than you being embarrassed and acting in a cringey manner (who the f**k seriously ditches their wife to teach them a lesson?) .

Brabs47 −  NTA – this sounds so bizarre, I couldn’t even imagine exactly how it sounds. She may be going through some kind of psychosis, many women experience chemical imbalances hormonal imbalances after childbirth.

This may seem a little harsh but you could record her and then later when speaking about it play it for her. Sometimes people don’t know how ridiculous they sound…. until they hear a recording of themselves

Edit to clarify I don’t agree with abandoning her in these moments. But I do understand why you did. However, you shouldn’t do it again, marriage is about communication. Speak with her directly about it and ask her why she thinks she’s talking this way and would she be willing to talk to someone (professionally) about it?

Clarifying (again) I don’t think he’s the a**hole because I understand why he left. He’s human. That doesn’t make him an a**hole. OP I hope you find closure in this situation and you are both able to work through it, best of luck to you both

Silver-Gold-Fish −  YTA. I get that it’s embarrassing, but think how your wife feels to be ditched in a public setting. The other thing is that you just assume she is purposely doing this. There are several different psychological & medical reasons that might be behind this. Get your wife the help she needs and deserves.

Maybe don’t go out to a restaurant….or if you do, don’t ditch her. She most definitely needs your love, help & support. The human body is absolutely incredible and complicated. If this just started, she probably has no idea what the hell is going on.

Between the insane changing hormones & stress, and how we understand genetics sometimes certain genes aren’t expressed until something like hormones & stress cause it to come out of the woodwork.

Please have some compassion for your wife because it is very likely she doesn’t know what’s happening either. It also sounds like this could possibly be vocal tics. Please get her the medical help she needs -From a current nursing student studying psych nursing

glacialcamera −  I’m going to go against the grain here but YTA. I know she embarrassed you with her inadvertent (and weird) baby talk, but you thoroughly humiliated her there. Without due warning. She may be spending too much time with baby and not realising what she’s doing.

Surely if you’d said to her seriously I can’t sit here and have dinner with you if you’re going to baby talk, please stop now. She needs some adult social time for def. I just feel sad for her, I know how insecure I felt after my first baby and my husband doing that to me would have absolutely confirmed all of my wildest, most hormone driven fears of not being attractive/interesting/young enough.

I’m not sure I would ever 100% forgive it, she must have felt like an absolute piece of s**t having to pay the bill and walk out alone after that. Post partum hormones can do strange things to people, cut her some slack. Edit: crikey thanks for my first gold guys!

Kebar8 −  I’m actually going to say yta, down vote it all you want.

1. When your a complete full time mum it’s hard to snap back into normal language, I’ve found myself making clicking noises that I do to call my cats to my colleagues as a total brain fart moment, so I feel that maybe it’s a similar thing here.

What has she said when you brought it up to her, does she even notice she’s doing it? I certainly wouldn’t let her laugh it off and really explain how embarrassing you find it, and how you want to spend some time just the two of you like adults

2. If you simply had a harsh word to her about this I wouldn’t be calling you an a**hole, but to leave your wife at a restaurant for something a little embarrassing. You turned a nice date out into a horrible problem when your wife finally got to get out of the house, so I feel it was totally blown out of proportion.

ashersquared2 −  YTA because you’re irritated by something that should concern you. This doesn’t sound anywhere close to normal. If someone I cared about started doing this I would be really concerned and maybe even take them to see a doctor or mental health specialist! I definitely wouldn’t just walk out and leave them sitting alone in a restaurant!

[Reddit User] −  YTA – not for being aggravated over the baby talk – but for leaving her at the restaurant, that was so cruel. both of you are behaving like children.

TheWholeTruthMatters −  YTA for leaving the restaurant with her. She needs help. Go see a couples therapist.

[Reddit User] −  Bit left field bur could she have PN depression or PN psychosis? Just sounds… odd.

Parenthood brings its challenges, but communication is key. Do you think the wife’s behavior is just a phase, or is it something deeper? How would you handle this situation if you were in OP’s shoes? Share your thoughts below!