AITA for telling my sister no when asked for money…again?

A Reddit user shares a frustrating dynamic with their younger sister, who frequently asks for financial help but struggles to pay it back or communicate effectively. After refusing to lend her money again and questioning her financial situation, the relationship has become tense. Read their story below.

‘ AITA for telling my sister no when asked for money…again?’

My sister and I are 5 years apart, me being the oldest. She asked for a 350$ loan in which I gave back in September after expressing to her some financial challenges I was facing and some supporting our Mother. She said she would pay me back and took the money for a much needed vacay to St. Kitts (right).

Came back and expressed she needed to pay me back in installments, I told her to keep it and put it towards my Mothers cell phone bill until the end of the year. Her and Mom are on a joint acct and I pay my Moms portion. She never confirmed this so…

Literally a month later she’s calling me asking for 700+ dollars for an application for some show. I basically told her she borrowed 350 and said she was going to pay me back and didn’t and let it ride. Now more money not even a two months later and knowing my financial situation. I asked her was she okay and what was going on with her finances. She got uncomfortable, she apologized for asking for more money and sent the 350 back to me.

I have not spoken with her since, she did not call the family for Thanksgiving and did not come but sent a text. She has plans to be home for Xmas but I won’t. It’s always awkwardness with us and I’m honestly over it, feels like it’s one thing after another and she’s either embarrassed or upset, either way at 35 her behavior is exhausting. I don’t intend to reach out and quite frankly could care less AITA?

Here’s what people had to say to OP:

extinct_diplodocus −  ESH. She asked to borrow money for a vacation!? And you gave it to her!? Clearly, she needed help organizing her finances more than she needed a vacation. Instead of actually helping her, with this, you helped pay for her vacation and thus further enabled her bad decision making. N T A for declining the most recent loan, but TA for the first one.

MissSweeet_ −  You’re definitely not the AH here. You helped her out, and she’s just taking advantage of your kindness. It’s totally fair to set boundaries, especially when you’re dealing with your own financial issues. She needs to get her act together.

kimba-the-tabby-lion −  NTA. 700+ dollars for an application for some show. That’s a s**m. It’s like having to pay for a job interview. Of course, she doesn’t care if it’s a s**m, why should she, it’s not her money.

mdthomas −  There is absolutely no obligation for you to pay for your sister’s vacations or other luxuries.. NTA.

ElmLane62 −  NTA. Frankly, you don’t loan money for somebody to go on a vacation. We ALL need to “get away.” If you don’t have the money for a vacation, you don’t go. Vacations are luxuries, not necessities. Tell her the “Bank of Sister” is permanently closed.

Same-School4645 −  AITA denied. You helped her out, set boundaries and held her accountable. She tested you for being a doormat and you failed that test thankfully. She needs to be more accountable and have more gratitude.

Low-Television-7508 −  NTA. Christmas alone tips. Charge your phone/tablet overnight, keep it on Do Not Disturb (or an outgoing message that you’re too busy Christmasing to reply). Sleep as long as the House Animal will let you. Get up, feed it, back to bed. When you go to the bathroom, bring snacks back to the bed, maybe something for the HA. When is the Christmas meal, noon or evening? Prepped yesterday.

Afternoon: sports, Christmas classic shows, music, or Reddit AITA to see how Christmas Was Ruined!! ™ Evening: check the phone/messages, answer those who won’t give you grief about ruining the day. This is the time to eat the goodies you bought on sale, give the HAs their gifts and treats. Fall asleep in front of the TV with the HA on your lap and remaining snacks close. There are variations, you can add/start your own tradition. The morning routine is the most important.

Careless-Ability-748 −  nta.

Fuzzy_Redwood −  NTA are you sure she’s not doing drugs?