My Gf is on tinder while I’m at the ICU for my father. What do I do? 23m 23f

A 23-year-old man shares his distressing experience of discovering his girlfriend using Tinder and engaging with others while he’s at the ICU supporting his critically ill father. Despite their three-year relationship, she expressed doubts about long-term commitment and refused to delete the app.

Feeling overwhelmed and betrayed during an already challenging time, he seeks advice on how to proceed.

‘ My Gf is on tinder while I’m at the ICU for my father. What do I do? 23m 23f’

My dad is at the ICU for pneumonia and influenza, he’s my only parent and has raised me my entire life. I told my gf I won’t be replying that much because I have a family emergency. I told her my dad so she knows. I’ve haven’t been messaging her for the entire day because I’m dealing with my father and I completely shut down.

I’ve already lost a brother and I can’t imagine losing my dad. After I messaged my gf she told sends me a screenshot of her talking to a guy on tinder who makes kinda of inappropriate comments. She told me to focus on my dad and not on her at the moment.

I’m just in complete shocked because she’s really doing all of that while everything that’s going on? She knows my dad is at the icu and so on. After she starts telling me she doesn’t think it’ll be good to be with one person forever and she should explore.

I told her to delete tinder but she’s telling me she won’t delete it for now. We been together for over 3 years and I feel so o**rwhelmed and sick to my stomach. Any advice what I should do will be really appreciated

Here’s how people reacted to the post:

Decent_Gas_4722 −  leave her, she sucks

Aware_Newspaper326 −  Your girlfriend? You don’t have a girlfriend anymore. Learn when to cut your losses, have some dignity. Your dad seems to be the only thing worth worrying about at the moment

Shelby_the_Turd −  After I messaged my gf she told sends me a screenshot of her talking to a guy on tinder who makes kinda of inappropriate comments. She told me to focus on my dad and not on her at the moment.

Lol that has to be one of the most childish things I’ve seen. She is deliberately trying to make you jealous and then says “focus on your dad”. I would kick her to the curb.

shypunkrockergirl −  I remember my ex bf breaking up with me while my mom was in a diabetic coma. Don’t make my mistake. Drop her please

LolaPaloz −  Why is ur gf on tinder at all and show u? She is a total n**cissist, d**p that bag of turds and focus on your dad

needanotherpudding −  Red flag. Run from her. You should be glad you are not married to her. Break up immediately. Can’t believe she is doing this during the time where you really needed her. She sounds like an immature b**t. Hope your dad recovers fully soon and you move on to a better person. All the best.

basic-fatale −  Imagine spending the rest of your life tied to this selfish person. Couldn’t be me.

Even_Budget2078 −  Oh my god, OP, your girlfriend is being extraordinarily cruel. What a deeply messed up thing to do to you. She’s trying to get your attention and make you focus on her, which is a massive red flag, given what is happening with your dad. Please ignore her and focus solely on your dad.

Do not spend any time arguing with her, trying to understand why she’s acting this way, don’t spend a second more thinking about her. She is clearly unable and unwilling to support you in your time of need. I hope you have other friends and loved ones who can be there for you.

Please reach out to those people and block her until this situation with your dad has resolved. Personally, I would break up with someone who acted this way. You may not feel that way, but now is not the time to deal with any of that. Focus on your dad. I am so very sorry about your dad and that your girlfriend has decided to act like garbage at such an upsetting time.

anitarielleliphe −  Your girlfriend’s behavior is extremely, extremely and profoundly toxic. This should be enough to end the relationship, and while it is terrible circumstances (your father’s illness), and my sympathies on that, please understand that there is a blessing here in finding out what her true nature is.

She is self-centered, self-absorbed, lacking empathy and consideration, and is playing mind games. This is not a woman to spend any more time and energy on, and a life with her will be full of drama, turmoil and unhappiness. She is deeply flawed, and I am doubtful that someone who would behave the way she is behaving will change for the better.

If she comes from a broken family, or one in which there is a lot of drama and toxicity, imagine that this will be her MO going through life, herself. My advice to you is to seek out the support of friends and family and stop communicating with her until your father stabilizes and you are emotionally ready.

And, then, do break-up with her. All you need to say to her is that the ways she behaved gave you a great amount of insight into who she is and you realized that you are 100% incompatible. She is playing games with you so when she realizes her tactics failed, she will probably try all sorts of other ones, but do not be fooled.

Nothing coming from her is sincere and there is nothing that really points to her having the capacity to truly care for you. She is only looking out for herself and will manipulate others.. Do NOT go back to her . . . ever.

Aggravating_Ad6847 −  Babe, hear me out. Leave her. I get you may like or love her. But this girl doesn’t love you. She doesn’t even respect you. And the thing is, if I were in a relationship. I would be sending your father and you flowers and coffee door dashes.

And being there. So I’m just letting you know not to settle for POS women. Please d**p her. And I’m sorry about your dad. I beat cancer last year. So I know what it’s like to be in and out the hospital. So if you need someone to talk to I’m here.