Update: My (f22) best friend (f21) is moving in with me, but has now gotten pregnant and wants us to raise the baby together

A Reddit user shared an update about her best friend, who was supposed to move in with her but unexpectedly became pregnant and proposed they raise the baby together.

After discussing the situation with their other future roommate, they gently set boundaries, leading to an emotional but constructive resolution. Read the full story below for all the heartfelt details of their journey.

For those who want to read the previous part: https://aita.pics/mjRhG

‘ Update: My (f22) best friend (f21) is moving in with me, but has now gotten pregnant and wants us to raise the baby together’

I took the advice someone gave to talk to my other future roommate Indy about it, and we both agreed that it was not something we wanted to do at all, and we decided to confront her about it together so she could understand it wasn’t going to happen. We got together at my place on Tuesday and had some tea.

We just sat down and said that basically we were very worried about her and the scenario that she had in her head about us raising the baby together is just completely irresponsible and we don’t want that at all. We decided to not lay out the whole thing about her mental health,

job situation and all that because we didn’t want it to feel like an attack on her but more just us setting some boundaries. She got really emotional and told us that she knew it was ridiculous but she was scared and in shock and really didn’t know how to react or think straight.

Apparently it wasn’t even her idea to begin with but some of her other friends we don’t know very well who came up with it and sorta pressured her to feel a certain way because they were extremely excited for her. She just said that she has been crying every day since she found out and she’s so scared for the future and really just want everything to go back to normal.

At that point we just said that we totally understand and we of course will be there for her no matter what she decides to do, but we really also felt that it would be a lot for her to be a mom under these circumstances. So yeah. She decided getting an a**rtion would be the best thing for her.

She said her initial reaction was to terminate the pregnancy but she had a lot if guilt associated with that as she has been brought up in a very conservative family. I’d rather not hear anything about the morals of that decision, as I don’t think that would really be helpful to the conversation.

We told her that we would be with her every step of the way if she needed it, and so we both went with her to the doctors on Thursday to confirm she was pregnant and to find out the options. Since she is only 6 weeks pregnant she could get some pills to take over a 48 hour period and that would make the embryo detach.

She got the first one at the hospital on Friday where we were there with her too, and then they both stayed over at my place the whole weekend for the rest of it since her parents still doesn’t know and she didn’t want to tell them. My roommate is conveniently on holiday with some of her friends for the rest of the week so we had the whole place to ourselves and nothing to explain to anyone.

She took the other pill yesterday and everything seems to be going smoothly, she just has a heavy period basically, which coincidentally ligned up with both Indys and mine (TMI sorry) so we have all been laying in my bed with heating pads and Netflix being a little miserable together, but things are going well and the pain have not been too much for just regular painkillers.

There has been some crying, lots of hugs and long talks and walks in the forrest and I feel like things are going to be okay. They’re both staying here until my roommate gets back so she can get through this in a comfy environment without having to pretend nothing is wrong.

So yeah, it seems like the plan of moving in together is back on as originally planned, and everything will be okay. Layla was offered some counseling at the hospital about getting through an a**rtion and the feelings about it which she is starting some time next week.

See what others had to share with OP:

babyishAuri −  She’s so lucky to have the both of you as friends. Hope your girl gets better

Mindtaker −  Great friends. Great boundaries. Great communication. Great support.. Great women all around.

apinkparfait −  That’s absolutely beautiful. This is the type of friendship you will look back decades from now and smile together.

Anony-Depressy −  Aw I love to hear that you were there for her throughout the whole process. Truly what friends are for. :,)

[Reddit User] −  She has some great friends looking out for her, she made the right decision. Please encourage her to get an STI test too before she tries dating again, just to be on the safe side.

banana_p3pp3r −  You handled this very well! Motherhood is hard already, and if you aren’t ready it’s a lot harder.

coraldan12 −  You guys sound like really good friends, wishing you all the best for your future!

[Reddit User] −  I had a similar experience regarding friend and termination of conception. Her life now nearly 2 years on is happy, healthy and positive. I definitely suggest your friend has counselling as termination can have a big impact on her mental health,

especially with her prior conditions. For now, just focus on being a kind, supportive and loving friend that you so clearly are. Good luck with moving in together too!

yankeecandledriver −  Obviously a**rtion is the best outcome here. Thank god it’s an option for women nowadays.

PlumCentedCloroxWipe −  So this is what a healthy confrontation looks like

Was the Redditor’s approach to setting boundaries while providing support the best way to handle such a sensitive situation? How would you navigate a similar scenario with a close friend? Share your thoughts and experiences below!