My Husband (40M) Changed Overnight, But I’m Concerned About the Sudden Transformation

A Reddit user (36f) shares her concerns about her husband (40m), who underwent a dramatic transformation after a camping trip two years ago where he experimented with shrooms. Since then, he’s become an entirely different person, taking up new hobbies, improving his career, and even changing his diet and lifestyle.

While all the changes have been positive, the user feels uneasy about how sudden and drastic the shift has been and wonders if something might be wrong. Read the original story below to understand her worries and the impact on their marriage.

‘ My Husband (40M) Changed Overnight, But I’m Concerned About the Sudden Transformation’

When I married my husband, I knew that he was an overweight, lazy video game nerd, and I loved him anyway for his warm heart and kind personality.
He detested exercise, stayed a low rank at his career because he put in minimum effort, and we bonded more over activities like watching movies together at home rather than going out.

He went on this camping trip with his friends two years ago, and did shrooms (he had never done drugs before, and had he consulted me I would’ve told him that was a terrible idea), and when he came home, it was like something had lit a fire under his b**t.

He completely changed interests – he never played video games again and took up running, reading books even though I’d never seen him read before except for school, and several other completely random hobbies. He became a vegetarian even though, before, he’d been a meat and potatoes guy.

He worked harder at his job, then did an accelerated grad school program and ended up making tons more money. I barely recognize him. We still have a good marriage, and I still love him, and he has motivated me to be better in the last two years, but….I can’t help but wonder if those drugs knocked a s**ew loose.

Could this be dangerous? I’m deeply concerned. I know that people change, but about all that’s left of him is his warm heart. No one shares my concerns because all his changes have been positive, but I feel like he’s so different maybe we need marriage counseling so I can adapt, at least…

Let’s dive into the reactions from Reddit:

murmathon −  I was an overweight, nerdy guy who detested exercise. I married and had three kids. One day I realized I had it all, a great marriage, great kids and I wanted to be around as long as possible to enjoy it.

I started to exercise, eat better, which changed my attitudes about things. I still enjoy the occasional video game, but also as much or more a hiking with the family. Being in better shape allows you to do more.

prometricfangirl −  Hi there. I am a fourth-year medical student preparing to start my training in psychiatry. When I read your headline I immediately thought, “Did her husband take a psychedelic d**g?” This is not an uncommon result of taking magic mushrooms, DMT, LSD, or a myriad of other hallucinogenic drugs.

Psychiatrists and other scientists hypothesize that these drugs can cause long-lasting positive changes in patients and your husband is an example of this. To our knowledge, this is not dangerous. Psilocybin mushrooms are one of the safest recreational drugs around.

So, your husband is likely completely healthy. However, I do recognize what a change this is for you and you are having difficulty adjusting. Have you spoken to your husband about this much? How does he explain his experience?

[Reddit User] −  If a metaphorical “s**ew” was indeed knocked loose, it sounds like the one that was keeping him immobile and unproductive. The analogy I’m about to make is gross,

I know, but it sounds like your husband was spiritually constipated, and the mushrooms were the necessary laxative. The direct effects of the shrooms probably wore off long ago, but now that he’s has a taste of success in his life, he’s not looking back.

R2Lake −  Best shrooms ad ever

Calandra205 −  I think more what happened was the drugs knocked whatever was blocking him off loose. It’s quite common after psychedelics, and they are being used more commonly in medicine for this reason (they are a good treatment for PTSD, depression and anxiety, and research into other uses in mental health is ongoing).

I get that the sudden personality change might be a lot to get your head round, but it probably is the effect of some sort of healing for your husband, so I wouldn’t necessarily be concerned for him on this basis. Does he seem happier with his life now (it def sounds like it)?

ChillWisdom −  I’m going to say this a gently as possible while still being blunt…..Is it possible that you are insecure now that he is more desirable? Maybe other women who didn’t notice him before are noticing now and that makes you uncomfortable.

It’s almost as though you want him to go back to being the guy that nobody saw anything in but you. You don’t seem to be proud or supportive of the positive changes he’s made. Perhaps speaking to a counselor will help you get to the root of what’s bothering you about this change.

chiquimonkey −  You sound deeply insecure about his positive changes, and that is sad. You sound like you were happier with the lazy, overweight, low effort, underachieving g**k, and feel outpaced by the person your husband has become.

You are just as deserving of this new version of you husband, but you now need to appreciate this new version please of him without somehow feeling resentful, suspicious & insecure. Counselling for yourself might be a good place to start.

Unfortunately, people who go through a significant transformation of self empowerment, either by losing a lot of weight, becoming upwardly more mobile through education and income, often face resentment & pushback from their closest friends & family who end up deeply resenting the changes & subsequent change in dynamics.

Otherwise-Sherbet −  God imagine turning your life around and STILL getting criticized.

shitty_grape −  Same thing happened to me. Did LSD and the next day I was no longer chronically depressed. It’s been 4 years. It’s a permanent change. It’s a good thing. Ask him what books he’s reading.

CoronaFunTime −  So this happened to a friend of my parents. He was always fat, not handsome, dressed bad, etc. He was already successful in business he just didn’t look good and was unhealthy.

One day he just started eating really healthy and took up distance biking. And no one (including his wife) knows why. He’s in his 60s and buff. He dresses really sharp whenever I see him. His face changed when he lost weight and he looks way more handsome. Sometimes people just have a switch flip

Do you think the user’s concerns are valid, or could this transformation just be a natural evolution in her husband’s life? How would you react if your partner suddenly changed in such a dramatic way? Share your thoughts below!