My BIL [34M] invited me [27F] and my husband [29M] to an orgy.

A Reddit user (27F) shares a shocking experience at her in-laws’ house during her father-in-law’s birthday celebration. Her brother-in-law (34M), who is in an open marriage and part of a swingers club, invited her and her husband (29M) to join an orgy he was organizing.

Though she immediately rejected the idea, she still feels uncomfortable and unsure about whether to tell her husband. Read the original story below.

‘ My BIL [34M] invited me [27F] and my husband [29M] to an orgy.’

This happened yesterday. We went to my in-laws house to celebrate my FIL’s birthday. The entire family was there, including my BIL and his wife. Now, everyone knows that they’re in an open marriage and they’re part of a swingers club, they’re very open about that.

I never had an issue with that and neither my husband, but we never had an interest in this sort of thing at all.. ​So imagine my surprise when my BIL, after making some small talk, told me that he was organizing a small orgy with a couple of friends and they needed two more people!

And what do you know, me and his brother were the perfect couple for it. I never in my life felt so uncomfortable as I did in that moment. I thought that maybe he was joking but he was completely serious. I told him that no, we weren’t interested.

But he just said to keep an open mind and that I should talk to my husband before giving an answer.. ​After that I just avoided both him and his wife and to be honest I didn’t enjoy much of the celebration. I just kept thinking about what had happened.

I don’t think anyone heard it because there was a lot of noise and I was making my way back to the living room when he showed up. There wasn’t any alcohol around the house since my FIL has had issues with it in the past, so I couldn’t even blame the situation on my BIL being drunk..

I still haven’t told my husband about it because I don’t even know if I should. They both barely have a relationship due to some conflicts in the past and I said very clearly that we weren’t interested, so that should be enough right?.

Here’s how people reacted to the post:

carnation345 −  He invited his own brother on orgy?? That’s next level weird

BitterFuture −  I, uh…yeah, wow. Tip of the hat to you for keeping your cool amidst a bucket of crazy. However! Despite being insanely uncomfortable, it seems like you do need to discuss this with your husband. Not to reconsider your answer in the slightest, but your husband should be aware that this happened.

After all, your BIL’s next conversation with him might well be, “So…given it any further thought?” “”What?” “You know, the orgy.” And then it goes downhill from there. Letting him be blindsided on that is no bueno. Also, there’s also the matter that this is kind of an unwanted s**ual advance on both of you. G**damn, this is weird.

rosephase −  Why wouldn’t you tell your husband?

ShelfLifeInc −  They both barely have a relationship due to some conflicts in the past. I’m now intensely curious to know what these past conflicts were. It’s not up to you to keep the peace between two adult brothers. If your BIL cared about his relationship with his brother, he wouldn’t have rocked the boat by inviting him to an orgy *via his wife.*

[Reddit User] −  This brother is crossing many lines pushing his sexuality onto family members. Seriously fucked up

bunnyball88 −  Tell your husband. “So, i had a weird conversation with [brother]. He invited us to his orgy. I told him ‘no’ and have no plans to continue that conversation. I figure you can take up any further discussion from here directly with him, but that is your call.”

stophittingthyself −  You need to tell your husband before his creepy, boundary pushing brother does. Don’t assume he won’t tell just because most people wouldn’t because he’s obviously out of touch with what most people would find acceptable.

Also now the shock is out of the way, try and think if someone pre-planned responses for if he asks you again. Don’t be afraid of being overly blunt.

C0nqueredworm −  I like to consider myself pretty open minded with a high tolerance for the unusual… but this is weird af. You should probably tell your husband. Also it’s funny to me that this thread is tagged non-romantic, most accurate tag I’ve seen.

[Reddit User] −  the fact that your BIL chose made the offer to you and not your husband is telling. that is extremely inappropriate and, honestly, creepy. i would tell your husband. your BIL either does not understand or actively does not respect boundaries.

Randster −  Girl…I’m actually pretty into that sort of thing and I think that’s weird. Coming at you alone and with family around….feels super creepy/aggressive for some reason when I read it. I’m gonna give some standard /r/relationships advice and say indefinitely avoid the BIL and tell your husband about it immediately so he can handle it.

How would you handle a situation like this? Do you think the user should tell her husband, or is it something that can be left behind? What’s the best way to deal with uncomfortable situations involving family members and differing lifestyle choices? Share your thoughts below!

For those who want to read the sequel: https://aita.pics/DshSp