I [27M] think my fiancee [27F] might be cheating?

A Reddit user shared their concerns about their fiancée’s possible infidelity after noticing changes in her behavior. She has become distant, started working longer hours, and frequently texts an unknown number. The user, drawing from past family experiences, fears the worst but lacks concrete proof.

Seeking clarity, they wonder how to approach the situation without causing further strain. To learn more about their dilemma and how others have responded, read the full story below…

‘ I [27M] think my fiancee [27F] might be cheating?’

Me and my fiancee “Sandra” have been together for 5 years, engaged for 8 months. Things were going great up until a couple of months ago.
My suspicion of Sandra started back in June. I noticed she has become more distant and cold towards me.

We talked about it and she says her job is stressing her out. Fair enough. The suspicions began to arise again a month later. I started to notice she would go to work really early and come home late.

She tried to brush it off by saying she’s working harder towards a promotion, but for some reason I don’t believe her. A couple of days ago, I obtained her phone records and it shows that she’s texted a certain number hundreds of times during July.

I talked to my older brother about this. Pretty much the same thing happened to him with his wife 3 years ago: leaving for work early + coming home late. A ridiculous amount of text messages to one number. Turns out his wife was cheating on him and they got a divorce.

By the end of the convo I was in tears. I didn’t want to believe it, but there is a good chance Sandra is cheating on me. IDK what to do at this point. I have no concrete proof that Sandra is cheating on me. Only suspicion. How should I approach this?

Here’s how people reacted to the post:

inkypinkyblinkyclyde −  I’d consider extracting the text messages from her phone, but if you are really at the point where you can’t trust her to answer your questions about this honestly then it is already over.

yebba1 −  Call the number to find out who, then ask her about them. You should be able to tell from her reaction and you can go from there.

[Reddit User] −  Ask her who’s number it is and then call it right in front of her. That way she can’t for any kind of plan with the other guy and she might just tell you what is going on.

throwmeacupoftea −  Just tell her “I know” and see her reaction.

DiscardUserAccount −  First do a reverse lookup on the number and see if you can get a name. You wouldn’t have to call and potentially tip your hand. Please keep us updated!

ho_made_apple_butter −  Tell her you phone is dead and ask to borrow hers real quick. Call that number, put it on speaker, set it down on the table in front of her.

antioch75 −  Contact the number and find out who’s it is.

Weekzilopochtli −  PLAN A: Unknowing accomplice. Assume he’s just as innocent as you. Call the number. Confirm the affair then meet up with dude.
DO NOT FIGHT HIM. Instead talk it out and team up. Text her to meet up for dinner at a place you won’t be sitting at when she would normally be with him.

When she says “pass” have him text her to meet at the real location you guys are at. When she arrives you both greet her cordially. Let her try and weasel her way out of it.. PLAN B: Knowing Accomplice. It’s the same story however when you meet up with him you find out he knew and didnt care.

Get past it because its over. Talk it out. THANK HIM for letting you find out what a horrible person she is before you got married. PLAN B – 1: If he doesn’t want a relationship with her: Call off the wedding and kick her out. If it’s a shared lease, leave with all your stuff and go to your brother’s house. Let her figure out all the bills.

PLAN B – 2: If he DOES want a relationship tell him to come and get her that same night after she’s busted. I know it will be hard to talk to him but if you have accepted that its over so that when you get there your only thought is revenge against her and how sweet it will be because its with the man she cheated with.

troofhoof −  A couple of days ago, I obtained her phone records and it shows that she’s texted a certain number hundreds of times during July. Two things. Getting her phone records? That’s some serious s**t. I mean if you’re at the point where you need to be pullign s**t like that, your relationship is already over.

And yes, I do believe your girlfriend is cheating on you. I don’t know what kind of proof you’re looking for that penny to drop, but you really don’t need. Just walk away before your behavior spirals even further down the rabbit hole.. Just get out now.

P.S. There is a bright side to all of this. You haven’t yet wasted an unholy amount of money on a wedding, and the inevitable divorce that was to follow. That’s just the universe looking out for you.