Should I Wear a Dress for My Partner’s ‘Dress as Your Partner’ Party?

A 24-year-old man is facing a dilemma regarding a “dress as your partner” theme party he’s hosting with his girlfriend. While he’s on board with the theme, he doesn’t want to wear a dress for the entire event, preferring comfort for activities like eating and playing games.

His girlfriend insists on him wearing the dress the whole time or scrapping the theme altogether. He’s unsure if he’s being unreasonable and seeks advice on how to approach this.

‘ Should I Wear a Dress for My Partner’s ‘Dress as Your Partner’ Party? ‘

I (24M) am hosting a “dress as your partner” theme party with my girlfriend (24F), and I’m facing a bit of a dilemma regarding the dress code. The idea is for everyone to dress up as their partner, and I’m fully on board with the theme.

However, I told my girlfriend that I don’t want to wear a dress for the entire party. I’m okay with wearing it during the voting portion of the event, but for the rest of the time, especially for eating or playing games, I’d rather wear something more comfortable, like sweats, which is what my girlfriend typically wears.

She, however, is insisting that I either wear the dress for the entire party or she wants to scrap the theme entirely. She also suggested I only wear the dress for 10 minutes, which doesn’t feel like it honors the theme at all.

I understand that she’s invested in the idea of the party, but I feel like my comfort should also be taken into account, and I don’t think wearing a dress for hours sounds fun for me.

I’m wondering if I’m being unreasonable or insecure by not wanting to wear a dress for the whole event. I’m happy to participate in the theme, but I want to feel comfortable while doing so. I’d love to hear some thoughts, especially from women who might understand where I’m coming from.

Here’s what people had to say to OP:

Preposterous_punk −  If I were one of your males guests, and showed up in a dress even though it made me uncomfortable, and then you went and changed but I had to stand around in a dress…

I’d be pissed as hell. This is the kind of theme where the hosts HAVE to go all-in for it to work. Otherwise it’s going to feel like, “ha ha, tricked you into wearing a dress.”

Qryiser1 −  If you get to change and be comfortable after the voting, so does everybody else. Tell them all to bring their comfy duds too.

trilliumsummer −  You say she mostly wears sweatpants, but what does she wear to parties? Also, are you telling your guests that they’re free to change after the judging is over?

Look, you’re obviously free to dress how you want, but I find it very disingenuous (and a little s**tty) to throw a party that requires people to dress in clothes that may make them uncomfortable and then for you to switch the bare minimum into the party.

So unless you can tell me your gf often wears sweatpants to parties, I agree with her not wanting to ask friends to do what the hosts (meaning you) won’t do.

Perfect-Resist5478 −  Why would you make the theme of your party something that you’re not comfortable with?

1568314 −  How did you agree to host this particular party if you weren’t comfortable participating??

L0veConnects −  You can wear shorts under the dress is your concerned about your bits. You might be surprised by how comfortable they can be.

sagittarian_queen −  Dress as her then? You said she usually wears sweats. Do that. You can dress it up with a wig, assuming her hair is long. Put on ridiculous make up and carry one of her hand bags. No dress required and still dressed to theme.

lizzyote −  If this event wasn’t themed, what would she be wearing? I doubt it’s sweats tho…

whenyajustcant −  Is it physical discomfort you’re worried about, or emotional discomfort? Dresses can be way comfier than jeans, if the one you’re going to wear isn’t maybe try a different dress? But if it’s emotional discomfort…maybe get over yourself?

Everyone there is going to be cross-dressing. I’d find it a little insulting if my bf was the only person balking at sticking with the theme, especially as the hosts.

Transmutagen −  Cancel the theme party. Clearly you don’t want to participate.

How would you navigate a situation where a fun theme conflicts with personal comfort? Is it fair to ask for flexibility, or should both partners stick strictly to the theme? Share your thoughts on balancing fun and comfort in party planning.