My husband (39M) seemingly unsure of setting barriers with his friend (37F) who kissed his neck twice in front of me (41F) and her boyfriend (37M) at a party.

A Redditor shared her emotional turmoil after witnessing her husband’s friend kiss his neck twice at a party in front of her and others. While her husband initially apologized and considered setting boundaries, he later dismissed the kisses as “friendly.”

The situation has left her feeling hurt and confused, as she struggles to address her emotions and navigate this challenging dynamic. Read the full story below for more details.

‘ My husband (39M) seemingly unsure of setting barriers with his friend (37F) who kissed his neck twice in front of me (41F) and her boyfriend (37M) at a party.’

Me (41F) and my husband (39M) have been married for more than 10 years. We celebrated his birthday with his friends whom I met for the first time. One of the ladies (37F) was very close to him and I caught her kissing his neck twice. One of them was like biting. They were drinking a lot.

I was very upset and eventually a few days later told him that I saw them. He didn’t remember at all but apologized and said maybe he should limit their relationship. One day later, he started believing these might be friendly kisses because they all behave very close towards each other within the same group of friends.

They all say that they love each other from time to time but “friendly” and they are proud of each other. He does not seem very happy after our conversation and I cry each time when I recall the kisses.

He gets more upset and I believe this is because he does not want to lose any piece of this friendship. A few days later, I joined them in a separate meeting (me, my love, the lady) and she mostly talked about herself (character, dress selections, shoes, friends, her family),

her job (business trips, education, upcoming job schedules) and my husband said he was proud of her. This hurts! Now, I am pretty much confused and not sure what to do, what to think and what to say.

Here’s how people reacted to the post:

rucafromtheeastside −  Something seems off. You’ve been married 10 years, but you are just now meeting his close friend group now? My husband also has a super tight friend group.

They tell each other they love each other a lot and are just generally a very positive and friendly, open and accepting group of friends. But never ever ever ever have any of the women kissed or attempted to kiss him. That’s a hard no and you need to make that clear.

blackcatsneakattack −  Didn’t you also overhear him say “i love you, too?” to her? He “doesn’t remember” because it’s something they do in private so often, he forgot they let it slip in public.

Last_Temporary8954 −  Nope. No. No. Nooooo! The friendship should be over and thats that. She crossed a line and he crossed a line by allowing it.. and thats whether you were there or not! I can not fathom this happening between my husband and I. He would never let another women get that close to him no matter what..

If your husband wasn’t interested in this lady atall then he would have no problem telling her the truth.. that his wife was uncomfortable with the way another woman touched her husband so out of respect for the woman he loves he thinks they should distance themselves from one another.

There’s nothing wrong with doing that. Unless of course he’s worried about her feelings more than he is yours?. Think about it. Your husband clearly dosent want to push her attention entirely away.. and why not? I would have zero tolerance on this. I guarantee he wouldn’t stand for the same disrespect.. so you shouldn’t either!

Decent-Boat8972 −  Have one of your guy friends kiss you the way they did and I’m sure he will be singing a different tune.

Ok-Preparation-2307 −  Your husband is openly cheating on you with his female best friend and not even lying well. You should stop believing his words and start believing his actions.

Ok_Perception1131 −  This was posted the other day…

Perfect-Day-3431 −  Just go back and read all the comments from your previous posts

thepoobum −  Yikes! Kissing someone’s neck is way too intimate and the fact she can do it in front of others confidently means it’s a usual for them and your husband totally likes it! Another red flag is that you only met her now.

She probably doesn’t take you seriously because your husband doesn’t have respect for you and did not put any boundary. He is smitten by her. Even telling her he is proud of her in front of you. Yeah. Your husband is disrespecting you right in front of your face.

4459691 −  It’s her or me. That’s it.

DifferentManagement1 −  He’s in love with her. They are having an affair.

Do you think the husband’s explanation justifies his friend’s actions, or should he prioritize setting boundaries for his wife’s peace of mind? How would you handle a similar situation where trust and boundaries are tested? Share your thoughts below!