AITA for refusing to babysit my nephew every weekend so my sister can party?

A Redditor shared their dilemma about being expected to babysit their nephew every weekend so their single mom sister can party. They love their family but feel their weekends are being sacrificed for her social life. Should family ties override personal boundaries? Read the story below to find out.

‘ AITA for refusing to babysit my nephew every weekend so my sister can party?’

I (28m) love my family, and I’ve always been close to my older sister (30f). She’s a single mum to my 5yo nephew. He’s a great kid, no complaints there. But over the past few months my sister’s been expecting me to watch him nearly every weekend.

It started off occasionally, she would have some big event or something planned, I’d step in. No big deal. But now it’s become this unspoken rule that I’m her free babysitter every Friday or Saturday night. The reason is she’s going out with friends, bar hopping and partying until late.

I get that being a single mum would be tough, and she deserves a break. But I work full-time and have my own life too. Lately I feel like my weekends are basically booked out for her social life. I’ve tried to suggest splitting weekends or at least some compensation for the extra time and cost

(I often end up buying my nephew dinner or taking him to a movie or something), but she brushes it off like “You’re his uncle, this is what family does”. I don’t mind helping out every once in a while, but every single weekend is too much. Last Saturday I put my foot down and said I already had plans.

She flipped out accusing me of abandoning her and my nephew and said I’m basically telling her she can’t have a social life. She then complained to our parents who said I should “do more for family” and to “think about what she’s going through”.

Now I feel conflicted. Am I the a**hole for wanting some boundaries and maybe not wanting to spend every Saturday night babysitting so my sister can party till dawn?

Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:

JMarchPineville −  “Sorry sis, I have a life too and have plans this weekend.”  Even if your plans are to rest or just sit in the couch to read a book.  Your time is your time. Don’t let someone else monopolize it… You won’t get it back

FunBodybuilder4620 −  NTA. I’m not a single mom, I’m a married one, and my husband and I haven’t had a date in 3 years because we don’t want to ask anyone to watch them nor do we have a babysitter we trust yet.

Sorry; but you don’t owe your sister anything just because you share DNA, other than what you CHOOSE to help her with. Being a single mom doesn’t give her unlimited childcare rights from family.

MaryHadALittleLamb20 −  NTA – why don’t the grandparents take their grandchild every Friday and Saturday night? Remind them you are not the childs father. Time to remind your sister that this is your nephew who you are not the father of. She needs to work out her babysitting with nephews father.

Each time she calls you selfish or tells you that you should do more you will do less. She needs to learn to be grateful not entitled and how is her son going to feel about her when he gets older and realises mom dumped me with uncle so she could go out and party.

chickentenderrr3 −  at the end of the day her child is her responsibility, she can let loose occasionally but every weekend is a little crazy just because we are “family”…. she can have a social life and take care of her child simultaneously.

she shouldn’t have to depend on someone else to care for her child so she can party and go out, that isn’t your responsibility whether you are family or not. you have your own life and things to tend to and that isn’t fair, that isn’t your child! I hope things get better for you :/

Secret_Sister_Sarah −  Obviously NTA. She’s expecting you to take equal responsibility for a child you played absolutely no part in bringing into the world. It’s great that you love the kid, and like to treat him to dinners and movies. Her \*expecting\* you to do so every weekend, though, is massively selfish of her.

Absolutely she should be paying you to babysit, as the service you’re providing for her is something valuable, it’s not easy and it’s taking away from your own social life.

Your parents telling you that you should do more for family sound like typical rage-bait Reddit parents… and I’ll give the typical, honest Reddit response: then THEY should volunteer to be her free babysitters.

Kimchilover30 −  Ask your parents to do more for family. You have done your share. You aren’t his father. Being a mother isn’t a 5 day a week job.

Consistent-Studio129 −  NTA. Ask her when it’s your turn for have a social life on. weekends? It’s her kid. She is a mother and her responsibility to balance it. You need time for yourself as well. Tell her if she can’t compromise then there will no weekends at all.
She can find an another solution. That’s not your job.. Cheers ✌️

Spirited-Water1368 −  NTA. How did she become so entitled?

Sparklingwine23 −  NTA, make some weekend plans with friends, coworkers, etc. If your sister books you for a specific event and you’re available then great but she can’t assume you are always available 24/7 without even asking. Establish your boundaries. You help out enough and would like to “party till dawn” yourself every now and then 😉

Present-Dark8700 −  Tell your parents they can look after their grandson every weekend

Do you think the Redditor’s stance on setting boundaries was fair, or should family always come first in such situations? How would you handle the balance between helping family and maintaining your own life? Share your thoughts below!