AITAH for embarrassing my older brother (28) at Thanksgiving dinner for sliding into the DMs of a girl much younger than him?

A Reddit user shared a Thanksgiving drama where they publicly called out their 28-year-old brother for sliding into the DMs of a 19-year-old girl they knew. The brother’s attempts included offering to buy alcohol and making flirtatious comments, which the girl found uncomfortable and shared with the user.

When the brother made a comment about dating during dinner, the user confronted him, causing him to storm out. The family believes the confrontation was too harsh despite acknowledging the brother’s behavior was inappropriate. Read the full story below and decide if the user was justified or went too far.

‘ AITAH for embarrassing my older brother (28) at Thanksgiving dinner for sliding into the DMs of a girl much younger than him?’

I am 22 F. I was a cheerleader all through high school. I am sorta friends with a younger girl I used to cheer with. “Sasha” (19F) was a freshman on my cheer squad when I was a senior. My brother went to our high school but he was way gone by the time I got there and even further gone by the time Sasha started there.

My brother did not know I knew about this prior to me calling him out. At the beginning of November, Sasha reached out to me. She DM’d me on Instagram and asked for my number. She sent me screenshots saying that my brother followed her and slid into her DMs a few times.

She said he followed her and began liking her Instagram stories that contained selfies and mirror pics. Sasha is very pretty and posts a lot of selfies. She said the first interaction came when she posted a picture of her and a friend with wine. She send me a screenshot.

He messaged her and said “Hey if you ever need someone to get you alcohol, I can make a run for you. I understand how hard it is to get drinks in this town while being underage:)” she responds wit “haha ok”. A few days later, she posted a picture with some guy friends from a party. One of the guys had his shirt off.

My brother replies to it and says “omg haha it cracks me up to see guys taking their shirts off at parties” Sasha does not respond. My brother double messages and says “I’ve been thinking, if you wanna go out with a real man who will treat you like a lady, I’d love the opportunity to make you smile :)”

she responds and asks if he is my brother (me as in OP) and he says yeah but he “saw you on the people may know and you wer too cute to not shoot a shot” she said that he’s a little old for her. My brother took offense and said “you look way too sophisticated to hangout with those f**k boys. I guess I thought you were more than you really are”

She blocked him after sending me the screenshots. It made me SO F**KING EMBARASSED I WANTED TO DIE, Sasha is 19 like ewww.
At Thanksgiving dinner, 10 of us were at the table. Convos got to dating and my brother made an incel remark about how women just want to date douchebags and how “real men” are treated like trash.

I said “real men don’t slide into the DMs of teenagers when they’re approaching 30” and proceeded to tell the story of him sliding into Sasha’s DMs. He lost it. He got up from the table, called me a f**king b**ch, and left my aunts house.

Surprisingly, my weird family is on his side. They said I embarrassed him and he’s my brother and I should be supportive. They agreed it was weird for him to DM Sasha but also said he didn’t deserve to be publicly called out. We still have not really talked since.. Aita?

Check out how the community responded:

boboddy42069 −  Yeah NTA. That’s really fucked up. Has your brother dated before? Why is he like this?. Imo he embarrassed himself

seastars96 −  NTA thank you for calling it out publicly

OppositeJello7903 −  So when he said incel s**t at the dinner table that was fine and appropriate, but you calling him out on it was a problem? NTA

Bigmamalinny124 −  Wow. Your douchebag brother was offended that you called out his absolute hypocrisy in front of the family. 😂 And your family is on his side? That’s just pathetic. He deserved what you did. He brought it on himself.

More of these losers need to be called out publicly for their actions. It is one of the reasons these hateful losers are hateful losers. They are not held accountable for their actions. Creeping on a young woman and blaming all women because he was rejected. L**er.

lgcsevilla −  NTA. Your family is being kinda s**tty for siding with him, whatever the reason may be. Having low self-esteem or being perceived as a failure are not excuses to coddle this manchild, neckbeard, incel behavior.

He totally deserved to be called out. Thank you for being brave. Now show this to your family so they can realize how s**tty they’re being.

Some_Troll_Shaman −  Let me check this. He threw a toddler tantrum because you described his actual behavior to your family after he opened the door on the subject matter and now your family are supporting him having a tantrum over this.. You are NTA here.. Your incel remark is on point..

Fragile masculinity exposed. If women wanted to date douchbags, he would be married by now. The I can buy alcohol for you line is super ick, Not surprised to read he is a controlling a**hole.

VictoryShaft −  Incel’s gonna incel.. “Wanna go with a real man…” When he gets here, have him raise his hand.

tajmicks −  NTA. He needs a reality check. Quite weird of him to say those things to the girl, and then even weirder for him to say all that at the dinner table.

gaymerladydragon −  Lmfao, he humiliated himself and you brought receipts. Your family is definitely trash for allowing him to continue his mental health like that.

zootedbologna −  NTA. Your brother is a predator. Good job for calling him out on his creepy b**lshit. Your family is only gonna enable it, though it seems. Continue to call him out on his creepy b**lshit cause he won’t stop, I’m sure.

Was the user right to confront their brother publicly for his questionable actions, or should they have handled it more privately? How would you navigate calling out inappropriate behavior within your family? Share your thoughts and experiences in the comments below!