AITA for refusing to repair my MILs phone after my 18 month old broke it?

Family mishaps can turn into full-blown debates when cultural values, money, and responsibility intersect. In this case, a 27‑year‑old mother recounts the controversy sparked after her 18‑month‑old child broke her mother-in-law’s phone. While her MIL was babysitting their little one, she handed over her phone for the toddler to watch YouTube—even though the family strictly limits screen time for their child.

When the phone was thrown and the screen cracked badly, MIL demanded that her daughter-in-law foot the bill for the repair. What followed was a tense argument over responsibility and financial fairness that has left relationships strained.

‘AITA for refusing to repair my MILs phone after my 18 month old broke it?’

Family and financial relationship experts point out that accountability for a child’s actions in a shared caregiving situation can be complex. Dr. Elena Rodriguez, a family therapist, explains, “When a caregiver makes a decision—like handing over a valuable phone to an 18‑month‑old—that choice carries consequences. In this scenario, the MIL’s decision was the root cause, not the child’s behavior.” Dr. Rodriguez emphasizes that, while young children are naturally unpredictable, it is ultimately the responsibility of the adult in charge to safeguard valuables.

Furthermore, financial counselor Mark Jensen adds, “In relationships where there is a significant income disparity, it’s important to set clear expectations about financial responsibilities. Asking a less financially stable couple to cover expensive repairs, when they clearly never consented to use their child as a ‘test subject’ for screen time, is both unreasonable and likely to create lasting tension.”

Both experts agree that the MIL’s actions, rather than the child’s behavior, are the core issue. They suggest that instead of forcing the repair costs onto a couple with limited means, a more balanced approach would involve discussing and sharing the risk of such decisions ahead of time. Open communication about each party’s responsibilities can help prevent future conflicts and ensure that all caregivers are on the same page.

Here’s the feedback from the Reddit community:

Reddit commenters are split on this issue. Many sympathize with the OP, arguing that the decision to give a toddler an expensive phone was solely MIL’s and that expecting a financially strained couple to cover the repair is unfair.

Others suggest that even if the phone wasn’t the OP’s responsibility, family events are occasions where shared responsibility should be discussed beforehand. Some believe a compromise—like splitting the cost—might have been a more mature solution, while others assert that MIL’s negligence leaves no room for negotiation.