AITA for asking my ex to move out by the end of the week?’

A 21-year-old woman allowed her ex-boyfriend to stay in her apartment temporarily while he was in a tough spot. Despite their breakup three weeks ago, he hasn’t contributed financially and their living arrangement has become increasingly tense, with constant arguments disrupting her studies and peace.

After a particularly stressful incident where he dismissed her need for quiet, she told him to leave by the end of the week, though their original agreement was for him to move out by December. Now she feels guilty for changing the timeline. read the original story below…

‘ AITA for asking my ex to move out by the end of the week?’

I (21F) live alone in my apartment, and my ex (22M) has been staying with me since August because he was in a tough spot. At the time, I agreed to let him stay temporarily, and even before we broke up, I told him he would need to move out sometime in December.

For context, he hasn’t contributed to rent, utilities, or any other expenses while living with me. And I didn’t even ask because I wanted him to get back on his feet. About 3 weeks ago, we broke up. Since the breakup, things have gotten really tense.

We argue all the time, and it’s so bad that I’m pretty sure my neighbors can hear us fighting. On top of that, I’m in the last month of my semester, I work two part time jobs, I have exams coming up, and worrying about my bills so I’m extremely stressed.

All of this has made it impossible for me to focus on my studies or feel at peace in my own home. Today, we got into another argument because he was being really loud while I was trying to study for an important exam.

I asked him to quiet down, and he told me to leave and study somewhere else out of the apartment. It was almost midnight by this point. That was the last straw for me. I realized I just couldn’t do this anymore.

I told him he needed to leave by the end of the week instead of sometime in December, as we originally planned. He got upset and now I feel awful because Im going back on what we agreed. So, AITA for asking him to leave sooner than planned?

Let’s dive into the reactions from Reddit:

shontsu −   About 3 weeks ago, we broke up. Since the breakup, things have gotten really tense. We argue all the time, and it’s so bad that I’m pretty sure my neighbors can hear us fighting. All else aside, you don’t bite the hand that feeds you.

If he’s upset that you’re breaking the agreement, he probably shouldn’t contribute to your home feeling like a hostile place for you. Breakups s**k, no mention of who/why/how/etc, but if dude wanted to stay living with you, he could have kept quiet,

made peace, and appreciated that he’s now living with an ex who not only doesn’t want to, but doesn’t feel like they have to put up with constant arguing.. NTA. You made the agreement with someone you were dating, you’re no longer dating. When circumstances change in your relationship, you can rethink prior agreements.

No_Nobody2274 −  NTA, what did they think was going to happen when telling you to leave your apartment while you’re studying and they’re not paying a cent to live there after breaking up? Like, really? What a sense of entertainment.

You’ve been fair and allowed them to stay and not pay bills to save money to move out while you work 2 jobs and go to school. Your ex is a total AH. Good luck with your exams.

New-Credit-9661 −  I’m a little confused because you said you let your ex move in because he was in a rough spot but then it seems like you say after he had moved back in, you broke up? Regardless NTA, you were doing him a kindness. He’s not paying rent or utilities, and has the audacity to tel lyou to ealve your apartment so you can study??!!

Orlando_the_Cat −  NTA. The situation has changed and it clearly isn’t working. Don’t set yourself on fire to keep him warm

xtine254 −  You are housing and adult that doesn’t F you, doesn’t pay bills, isnt your relative and disrespects you? I know you are young, but that doesn’t mean you should be foolish. Should have kicked him out with the first argument.. NTA

Proof_Restaurant9640 −  you could give him until the end of the day – still wouldn’t be the a**hole. NTA. obviously NTA. he hasn’t paid a cent & he’s your MEAN EX!

AvaHelioHaze −  NTA. Your mental health and well-being should always be a priority. While it is considerate to think about the position you’re putting your boyfriend in, your home should be your sanctuary. It’s important to have a space where you can recharge and feel at ease.

As long as you’ve given him reasonable notice and acted within the legal framework of your area, you’ve done everything right. Relationships can sometimes come down to tough decisions, and it sounds like you’re making one with both of your best interests at heart.

BombshellBre95 −  NTA at all. And the way my eyes widened when he told YOU to leave YOUR apartment to go study elsewhere. An apartment where he pays absolutely no rent or utilities?

The absolute audacity! Do not feel bad about kicking that free loader to the curb. If anything he should have been gone as soon as yall broke up. You were helping out your bf when he was in a bind. He’s no longer your bf. He doesn’t need to be there.

Sassypants2306 −  NTA.. Tell him to get out. He’s not on the lease and is no longer welcome in the apartment. Bag up all hos s**t at weeks end and d**p it out front.

Is she justified in prioritizing her mental health and peace, or is reneging on their initial agreement unfair? Share your thoughts below!