AITA for not answering my co-worker phone calls on a weekend ( they usually last for 45 to 70 mins for no reason)?

A Reddit user shares their frustration with a co-worker who insists on lengthy, unnecessary phone calls outside of work hours, despite being explicitly told they prefer texting and value their personal time.

After setting clear boundaries and refusing to answer weekend calls, the co-worker became upset. Was this response fair, or did they overstep? Read the full story below.

‘ AITA for not answering my co-worker phone calls on a weekend ( they usually last for 45 to 70 mins for no reason)?’

My colleague who i explicitly explained to them, that I don’t like to talk over the phone, and I’m more comfortable using texts, got angry because i refused to talk to them over the phone about literally nothing on a weekend.

There’s nothing at work that needs or require us to have this call. I wanted to set boundaries, so i told them I’m not going to answer my phone outside of work hours, and if they need anything they can just text. But they got very upset and kinda disappointed in me.

I don’t want to cause them any harm or bad feelings, but at the same time i feel like i shouldn’t have to go above and beyond just to make them happy. Honestly, I’m having conflicted feelings, what do you think i should do ?

Here’s the feedback from the Reddit community:

hubertburnette −  NTA. Do you think they’re trying to make friends with you? Or already consider themselves a friend?

Due-Passenger7093 −  Yeah no… if your co-worker is lonely that’s not your responsibility… NTA. and in case that’s a situation where you’re a female (male) and someone of the opposite s** is pressuring you

(can also happen in same s** situation but highly unlikely statistically) constantly calling you and pestering you… that’s what HR is for… that’s absolutely harassment

IamIrene −  NTA. This is a work relationship, your colleague thinks it’s a personal relationship. Definitely need boundaries and clarification. I don’t want to cause them any harm or bad feelings

If they will not accept your personal boundaries, then they really aren’t the kind of person you need to involve in your life…beyond work related issues that is. It’s their unrealistic expectations of you that is hurting them.

All they have to do is listen to you and this person is choosing not to so any pain they feel at your boundary is really on them. You don’t have to set yourself on fire to keep others warm.

LeonardoSpaceman −  “But they got very upset and kinda disappointed in me.”. So f**king what?

TemptingPenguin369 −  NTA. Unless you are social friends out of work, or this is a work emergency that needs to be settled on a weekend, don’t pick up the phone. Accept the fact that they may have bad feelings for injecting themselves into your personal time, and that’s their problem to resolve.

Mother_Shopping_8607 −  I AM SO PROUD OF YOU❤️❤️❤️ (weeps in happy work boundaries tears). I worked with someone who would ALWAYS call when he knew I was getting off work. I stopped answering. This went on for years.

He complained that I was “ignoring him”, but I had a years-long trail of emails I would send the next day, saying that I saw he called, but did not leave a message or text, so I was just following up. NTA a billion times, but start your own email trail in case someone starts complaining. 🙂

Kukka63 −  NTA, there is no reason for you to chat with your co-worker on a weekend, what a weird expectation from them. They really need to find other hobbies and things to do during the weekend other than calling you.

Informal_Candy_2814 −  He’s crossing a line. You aren’t required to do more communication with him outside of work. If he has issues with this, talk to your manager. NTA

CandylandCanada −  NTA. I fail to see how you could possibly be conflicted on these facts. This person is trying to manipulate your emotions and monopolize your time.

Do you consider yourself a people-pleaser? If so, then you should seriously consider what it’s costing you to tie your mental health to others’ opinions of you. Your happiness will rise inversely with the amount of energy that you devote to caring what other people think about your choices.

fivenightrental −  NTA. Stick to your boundaries, they are pushing at them to see if they can manipulate you into getting what they want. They are a *coworker*, not a friend. There is no reason to talk to them outside of work, period. I would also not respond to texts outside of working hours either.

Was the Reddit user justified in setting clear boundaries, or should they have tried harder to accommodate their co-worker’s preferences? How do you handle work-life balance when dealing with overstepping colleagues? Share your thoughts below!