WIBTA if I ask for the eggs I paid for than the generic ones from my roommate?

A Redditor seeks advice on whether they would be the asshole for requesting their roommate replace the specific eggs they bought with the same quality, rather than the generic ones he usually gets.

After discovering that their organic, free-range eggs had been used up, the user reflects on a previous instance where their roommate replaced heirloom tomatoes with standard ones, prompting them to consider how to address this recurring issue without causing tension. For the full story, read below…

‘ WIBTA if I ask for the eggs I paid for than the generic ones from my roommate?’

This might be petty asf but pls tell me (f22) how I should go about it. So my roommate (m21) messages in the group chat and says “hey folks, I’ve used someone’s eggs from the fridge. I will return them when I get my grocery tomorrow”.

When I got home I saw they were mine and they’re all gone except 1 ( I don’t remember how many were in there but I didn’t use much and it was a box of 12eggs).

Now I don’t have a problem at all that he used them but the problem is he has done this before with other groceries like veggies and eggs and all and when he replaces them he gets the generic stuff like the cheapest option.

I’m very particular about my groceries I take time to choose what variety of apples or tomatoes or eggs etc I want. And at most times I get the more expensive version cause I just like it better.

Last time he borrowed some tomatoes and they were those heirloom tomatoes that I got from the farmers market and when he replaced them he got the normal ones to which I just said don’t worry about it I don’t want those tomatoes.

Now this time the eggs that I use are the organic free range extra large eggs and they are expensive than the normal ones but I don’t want to use the generic ones just because he wouldn’t get them.

So WIBTA if I say anything about these things, or if not then what should I say to him, I don’t want to make it too awkward but I would still like to address it.

Check out how the community responded:

victrin −  NTA. But you’re being setup to be TAH. This may be on purpose or not. Next time something like this happens. Reply with something similar to the following:. “Hey Roommate, No problem at all! These things happen. The eggs you used were X eggs from Y store.

I specifically bought those as they’re my preferred meal. Please swap those back in as soon as you can. Thanks!” If he chimes back that his generic substitute is fine, you can reply “Oh I have nothing against Z brand eggs, I just specifically buy X eggs as I particularly prefer them.

Since I bought X eggs for myself, and you used them, please return what was used”. He may push back again. This is where you turn the tactic around. “Wow, it kinda hurts that you would use something of mine, not replace it, and blame me for it. I bought those for me.

I understand you used them and that’s ok, but then you don’t want to replace them. Your judgment on how I spend my money is harsh, especially since you seem to enjoy the things I’m spending it on. I’d like to enjoy them too. Please replace my eggs”.

StarCrumble7 −  NTA and say something firm ASAP. I had an ex roommate who would REPEATEDLY: 1. Eat an entire bottle of my organic Heinz ketchup every couple of weeks and replace it with HUNTS 🥵 (lol sorry Hunts dippers, that’s like coke vs pepsi)

2. Speaking of, I would buy a 12 pack of Coke cans which would last weeks and weeks before living with him. He would drink the whole box while I was at work and claim he had had a diabetic emergency. Then he would replace the 12 pack with one 2 liter bottle.

ETA: I was scared of making it awkward and didn’t say anything, I just started unsuccessfully hiding things. This was 12ish years ago and 😂😭 at young me.

TrickyLG −  “That’s fine – they were the organic free range extra large eggs, so please get the same ones”

Trick_Delivery4609 −  “You used my organic free range extra large eggs. Please replace the exact same type. If you don’t, please be aware that you may not use any of my food in the future.” Mark your name on things or everyone get a shelf or something.. NTA 

FairyCompetent −  NTA. Respond in the chat with “they were mine, they were (x) kind, thanks!” If he presents you with different eggs, say “these are not the ones I buy.

If you want to use something of mine, I egg-spect you to replace it with the same thing.” Asking for what you’re owed isn’t rude in the least, and if someone acts like it is they are acting in bad faith. 

catskilkid −  NTA – Anyone that takes without asking first does not have the moral high ground to complain about exact replacements. If (and I mean if), he did not know there was a difference, then he needs to be informed. If you don’t tell him, then he is not really at fault if replaces it with what he thinks is comparable.

If you let him know, then he’ll be aware of the value of the item he is “borrowing”. Can’t assume he’ll blow up over this, since he is the one at fault and claims to want to replace what he took. Speak up and let him know.

Ok_Smoke_1056 −  NTA – As a person living on a farm, I can tell you that not all eggs are the same. I can’t eat commercial eggs and my nutritionist says it’s most likely got to do with the concentrates that battery hens are fed. The same applies to heirloom tomatoes.

They have a very different taste and texture so I’d be pissed if someone took my top shelf stuff and tried to replace it with bargain bin crap. Just tell him that you understand that sometimes, he might run out of things and it’s convenient to “borrow” from your housemates.

However, he needs to understand that you prefer quality over quantity and replacing your carefully selected groceries with generic ones is no longer acceptable.

In the future, you’d appreciate if he called or sent a message if he needs someone else’s groceries or quite simply, go shopping and make sure he has everything he needs. Generic, or whatever. If it happens again, label your food and tell everyone in the house that your food is off limits.

SavingsRhubarb8746 −  Send to the group chat “Looks like those were my eggs – I’ve only got one left. Just to remind you, they were Brand X eggs, the extra-large free-range kind in the boxes with the blue label. Thanks for replacing them!”

And if he comes back with something like “I don’t think Big Bargains sells that brand, but they’ve got regular eggs on special this week” answer “I got them at Main Street Grocery. I want the same eggs that you took – I bought that brand because that’s the kind of eggs I like, and I don’t want the regular eggs.”

You have to make the point firmly, and it’s better to be open in front of the group. There are people who always seem to replace what they “borrow” with the cheapest possible alternative. Maybe some of them can’t tell the difference, but some I am sure are just unwilling to replace like with like.

NOTTHATKAREN1 −  NTA. He’s not replacing your stuff. He’s replacing it with generic stuff & that’s not the same thing. It doesn’t even taste the same. I would just say, I don’t mind you borrowing my stuff, but you need to replace it with exactly what I bought.

Generic isn’t going to cut it. If he has a problem replacing it with the proper replacements then he can’t borrow your stuff anymore. It’s just common courtesy. But he just doesn’t get it. You replace what you took with exactly the same thing. It’s not ok to cheap out on someone else’s stuff.

relatxtbn −  NTA. Text your roommate saying, “Hey! These are the eggs I like to purchase. I usually get them at random store”.
If this is another heirloom tomato situation, then I would suggest boundaries and making it clear your eggs are not free reign.

Do you think the user is justified in wanting their roommate to replace the eggs with the same quality they originally bought, or is it too much to ask? How would you approach a similar situation with a roommate regarding shared groceries? Share your thoughts below!