AITA for not giving a s**t that the kid drops out of gymnastics?

A Reddit user is facing a disagreement with their spouse over whether their 8-year-old child should be allowed to quit gymnastics. The child is often too tired after walking to and from school to attend the weekly evening class, but the user feels that pushing them might backfire.

While they’re okay with their child changing their mind about activities, the spouse worries that allowing this will make their child more prone to “quitting” or “chickening out.” Now, the user wonders if they’re wrong for not taking a firmer stance. Read the full story below.

‘ AITA for not giving a s**t that the kid drops out of gymnastics?’

Kid (8) is too tired to go to gymnastics in the evening, once a week. They walk 2km to school and back every day, so not enough gas in the tank when evening comes. I seriously dgaf if it cost us $200 for this one semester, she has to be able to change her mind.

My SO gets angry, her opinion is that it will be negative for kid’s character development, that we are too weak, that kid learns to chicken out and becomes a quitter. Me, I’m thinking they will find something they love doing one day, and that this will ignite an interest and a passion. AITA for just pretending to gaf, and letting kid off the hook?

Here’s what Redditors had to say:

No_Introduction1721 −  So to hear you tell it, your daughter actually enjoys doing gymnastics, but she’s too tired for physical activity in the evening because she walks 4km each day. So like… why does she have to walk to school? Can’t she get a ride or take the bus or something, at least on the days she goes to gymnastics class?

Seems like addressing the actual source of the problem would keep everyone happy. Gonna go with ESH unless there’s a comment explaining your daughter’s perspective and why she’d rather be walking to school than doing gymnastics.

scrunchie_one −  YTA not for not wanting your kid to go to gymnastics but your general attitude towards parenting. Kids don’t just ‘find something they love’ – they find something because you encourage them to do so. An 8 year old isn’t always going to love going to gymnastics, so it’s up to you as a parent to either ‘force’ them to go, to a certain degree, or if they are absolutely miserable, present with other options.

I don’t think kids should be in a different sport/activity/music class 7 nights a week, so if they are overscheduled then yeah, you’re probably right, but if this is the one thing a week they do outside of school, then your partner is right; it does build character and also friendships, social skills, and a lot of other things.

If your kid is too tired from walking 4km/day, then maybe that’s something to address. Why is their walk to school so damn long? Can they take a bus, or get a ride one way?? 2 km seems extreme for a 3rd grader to walk each way and it seems like it’s impacting their quality of life if they don’t have energy for anything else.

string-ornothing −  I had low iron as a girl and I was always exhausted. That is not a long walk at all. Did this exhaustion start recently? Has she been to a doctor? That level of tiredness from walking is a huge concerning thing for a girl her age tbh.

Aggressive-Flan-8011 −  Okay why is everyone acting like the only thing the kid did that day to tire her out is the walk home? She just got done with a whole day of school. I’m a teacher reading this after school and I’m exhausted and I just drove home.

She’s gotta sit, behave, do things she doesn’t want to do, hold herself still, try things that are difficult… You guys, school is hard. Literally today on ask a manager one of the questions is “is it bad that when I get home from my job at a school I put on my pajamas and refuse to leave the house again?” No one is asking if that lady has a nutritional deficiency.

My own daughter was having a fit about going to gymnastics right after school last year. It was too back-to-back for her, we didn’t have an issue with other events later. What worked for her was a special relaxing break. On Mondays she got an extra good snack and a cuddle and conversation right after school and then she was happy to go.

Maybe the OP needs to experiment instead of giving up. Maybe pick up the kid from school once a week, it won’t take away from her experience walking with friends or whatever he said about not walking. Or discuss what self care works for her and would restore her energy after school. Try literally one thing?

Worth-Season3645 −  More info…who wanted to sign up for gymnastics? Child or parent?

igetthatnow −  INFO: What have you done to try to determine why that walk is so exhausting for her? Have you been to the doctor to look for underlying issues? Is she eating her lunch at school?

NArcadia11 −  YTA. Your wife is right. You can’t let kids skip everything they don’t want to do. It sounds like she likes gymnastics, and sports are an important part of child development., so by having her continue it even if she doesn’t always feel like it on the day, she’ll learn important traits like commitment and a good work ethic.

Also, walking about a mile a day isn’t strenuous at all, so it shouldn’t stop her from doing a sport she committed to when she signed up. This is an occasion where being an active parent will benefit your kid and teach them good life skills.

Serpents_disobeyed −  I would be surprised if the walking is what’s making her too tired to do gymnastics. I know it seems weird if walking isn’t a big part of your kid’s life, but 2 2km walks in a day shouldn’t be a lot for an eight-year-old once they’re used to it.

But whyever she’s too tired, if she really doesn’t want to keep doing gymnastics for now, you’re NTA for not making her. I would be curious about what the real problem is, though.

Commercial-Horror932 −  Soft YTA because you said that she actually loves gymnastics and is just too tired. So it doesn’t sound like she really wants to quit because she’s not enjoying it. It seems very peculiar for an 8 year old not to have energy to do an activity after school once a week, even with the walk.
Does she have other activities going on or is it just gymnastics?

Ashes_falldown −  INFO: How long has she been doing it?

Do you think it’s important to encourage kids to stick with commitments like sports, or is it better to let them explore activities until they find one they truly enjoy? How would you handle this situation? Share your thoughts below!