AITA for telling my sister to just s**k it up and wear the bridesmaid dress our cousin chose?

A Redditor’s cousin, Christie, has chosen bright orange satin bridesmaid dresses with a pink floral pattern for her upcoming tropical-themed wedding. While the Redditor appreciates the dress and supports Christie’s vision, her sister Jessica vehemently dislikes it, deeming the color ugly and the fabric impractical for a beach setting.

Jessica has been pleading for the Redditor’s help in convincing Christie to change the dress or let them select their own. The Redditor believes that being a bridesmaid means prioritizing the bride’s wishes over personal preferences and urges Jessica to accept the dress.

Despite Jessica’s discomfort, the Redditor feels it’s not reasonable to confront Christie about the situation. read the original story below…

‘ AITA for telling my sister to just s**k it up and wear the bridesmaid dress our cousin chose?’

My cousin Christie (27F) got engaged a few months ago and asked my sister Jessica (20F) and I (25F) to be bridesmaids in her wedding. She recently sent the bridesmaid dress she picked for us in the bridal party group chat, and everyone immediately gushed about how much we loved it, and Christie was clearly very happy and excited about the dress.

It’s an orange satin dress with a pink floral pattern. It’s definitely a very bright and bold choice, but I personally think it’s really pretty, and fits her colorful tropical wedding theme really nicely. However, my sister Jessica HATES everything about dress.

She thinks the color is u**y, the pattern is tacky, and that satin is impractical for a beach wedding. She does not want to be seen wearing it or have pictures of her in posted on social media. She has been begging me to help her talk to Christie about it and tell her to pick a different dress, or let us choose our own dresses.

She also wants to reach out to the other bridesmaids (who are mostly Christie’s friends who we barely know yet) and ask them their opinion, because she is certain no one else likes the dress. I’ve told Jessica that she just needs to s**k it up, because part of being a bridesmaid is realizing the day is not about you or your preferences.

We are there to support the bride and make the day special for her. Christie clearly has a certain vision for her dream wedding, and I feel like wearing the dress she wants for one day is not a huge ask. Jessica does not see it that way, and believes she should not be made to wear a something she is not comfortable in.

It would be different if her discomfort came from the dress being too revealing, or if she wasn’t comfortable wearing dresses in general. But her argument basically boils down to the dress being u**y in her opinion and not her style. I don’t know how we would confront Christie with this without insulting her taste and potentially hurting her feelings.

The wedding is still 8 months away, so if I’m the a**hole here and should try to change Christie’s mind on behalf of my sister, now is the time to do it before everyone has bought the dresses and gotten alterations. But I would rather just avoid the drama.

CrimsonKnight_004 −  NTA – I think you’re absolutely right that this would be different if her concerns were about the dress being more revealing than she’s comfortable with or if she didn’t like dresses. But this is just a stylistic difference.

I think it’s very reasonable for a bride to want her bridal party to stick to a certain theme as long as it’s nothing outrageous or unreasonable. This isn’t outrageous or unreasonable, it’s just a theme. This is the kind of thing where Jessica has two choices. Wear the dress and be a bridesmaid, or don’t be a bridesmaid and wear her own dress as a guest.

MissNikiL −  NTA. Might be time to show your sister 27 Dresses. 🤣 Honestly your sister either needs to step out of the bridal party or get over it. The dress has nothing to do with her and everything to do with what the bride wants. Acting like a b**t about it isn’t going to do anything other than make her look like a b**t.

I look like a sickly Victorian child in certain colors but if my friend wanted that color for her bridesmaids I would wear it gladly. If nothing else it would make her look even more amazing on her special day.

LadyAlexTheDeviant −  NTA. Sucking it up and wearing a dress you NEVER would have worn in a million years is a time-honored part of being a bridesmaid.

PercyWallace −  My buddy is a huge Miami Dolphins fan and that was his wedding theme…. Fuckin Dolphin’s colors (we live in Illinois btw) I had to wear a white suit with a green vest and an orange tie.. It was ridiculous.

But he thought enough of me to make me one of his groomsmen so I rocked that s**t like it was my funeral on prom night. Being in a bridal party is an honor, sooooo not only is your sister an a**hole, she’s an ungrateful a**hole.

tosser9212 −  Do tell your sister to withdraw as a bridesmaid: her e**itled attitude is going to create disruption for everyone over the next few months and at the wedding.
NTA for telling Jessica to s**k it up. Totally T A if you intervene with Christie.

UmmmmmAckshully −  It’s so interesting how your sister has the lady balls to try to get you to talk to the bride but not talk to her herself. You’re right to stay out of it. NTA

Typhon745 −  How expensive is the dress and are you all paying for it out of your pockets or is the bride handing the payment

Nanaman −  NTA. If she doesn’t want to wear the dress she should ask to not be a bridesmaid. Wearing a dress that doesn’t match your style is literally the least someone could do to be a decent person for a family member’s wedding day.

TemptingPenguin369 −  NTA. Jessica has two options and neither of them are telling the bride that the dress is u**y. She has to go along with the dress as chosen, or she has to drop out of the bridal party.

Having-hope3594 −  NTA  Oh my, reaching out to other bridesmaids.Trying to make a case to the bride.This could stir up a lot of problems and drama for your cousin.Which is, of course, the opposite of what bride maids are supposed to do.Which is to support the bride. Good call on your part. 

What do you think? Should the Redditor support her sister’s feelings, or is it more important to respect the bride’s choice? share your thoughts below!

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