AITA for telling my neighbor to use their own water?

A Reddit user recently moved into a duplex and noticed their neighbor using their water faucet to water the garden and wash shoes. After confronting the neighbor about the water usage, it led to an uncomfortable exchange, with the neighbor expressing frustration over the request.

The user now wonders if they were being too harsh for standing their ground, as the water usage seemed minimal but the responsibility felt significant.

‘ AITA for telling my neighbor to use their own water?’

Some background my wife and I moved to a duplex last month. We’ve lived in apartments our whole lives and never had to pay for water/sewer/garbage and now we do. We haven’t gotten our utility bill yet (comes every two months) and I’m dreading the number.

There is a detached garage building at the front of the lot. On this garage unit are two faucets, one on their side and one on ours. When we moved in, there was a hose already attached to our side so I thought the previous tenant just left it and bought myself a nozzle.

We recently noticed that the neighbor’s wife will use that hose several times a week to water the garden area and wash shoes. I was looking for the right time to ask them about this and it just so happened today she walked by while I was building a shelf in the garage.I asked if the faucet was connected to our meter or theirs and she said she’d ask the husband.

He came out a few minutes later and asked what the problem was. I asked the same question and he said we can check by closing the valves on our side but added I was the first to ask and the previous two neighbors never made a big deal out of it and that his wife only used it to water the front lawn.

But here the wife interjected and confessed she washed shoes a few times a week (which she had to as I was just there 10 minutes before when she was washing shoes). He cut her off and said “No, you don’t, you never wash shoes”.Lo and behold that faucet is attached to our water meter.

I asked if the hose was his to which he answered yes and then he asked if I would like to move the hose to the other faucet to which I nodded. I could tell he was pretty upset from the earlier comments and he was continually grumbling stuff like: “oh ok since you want to be so strict”, “my wife only uses like 3 cents of water”, “i was gonna give you a power washer to help wash your car but ok I guess not”, and s**t like that.

Guess he was pretty flustered as he couldn’t unscrew the hose. He came back with a wrench and still couldn’t do it. While he was gone a second time, I unscrewed the hose (he probably loosened it, I’ll give him that), took my nozzle off, and screwed the hose onto his faucet.

When he came back, he saw it was done then talked to me a little about putting a “Smile, You’re on Camera!” sticker to our backyard door as he was concerned about dog walkers not cleaning up after their pets on our front lawn (I obliged and the sticker is on our yard door).

Should I have just let them use our water? She doesn’t really use too much and he could be right about the 3 cents (ballpark). [The way I read the water billing here we pay $5.29 per CCF for the first 10 CCF, $6.17 per unit thereafter].

TL;DR: Noticed neighbors using our faucet for gardening/washing shoes; confronted them and got a hissy fit from the husband as it was never a problem with his two neighbors before.

Lets dive into the reactions from Reddit:

Fear5d −  NTA. Even if he really is correct about it being a minute amount of money, that means that it shouldn’t be any problem for \*them\* to pay it. Why should you fund their water usage?

JPenelope −  NTA. If it’s only 3 cents and they have their own faucet basically in the same location they don’t have a leg to stand on as to why they would use yours.

Maybe pay attention to your water bill over the next few months and see what the difference actually is. I don’t know how big the lawn is, but watering a lawn takes quite a bit of water. I’d hazard a guess it’s more than pennies’ worth of water they’ve been stealing from you.

PDK112 −  NTA. Funny how the neighbor claims that it is no big deal to use your water, but he makes it a big deal. If it was such a minor issue, he would have moved the hose to his faucet without being passive aggressive about it.

Aggressive_Cattle320 −  NTA These people have quite the gall to think it’s okay to use their neighbor’s water! They have a spigot on their own side of the home, and that is the one they are supposed to use! Why would anyone attach a hose to the opposite side of the home they live on, knowing it’s a duplex? Only one answer. They found it much more affordable if you paid the water bill!

I don’t care if she uses 3 cents of water or 30,000 cents of water. They are responsible for paying for their own danged water! And the “okay, well, I was getting ready to give you a power washer blah blah” was nonsense.

He was only saying that because he was trying to guilt you into buying his pathetic story. If he had money to buy a power washer to give you, my guess is he would have helped himself to “borrow it”, attached to your faucet, to do his own power washing work, on your dime!

Don’t let them guilt you into anything. They are people who love taking advantage of others, and if they refuse to speak to you, consider yourself lucky!

TheWoman2 −  NTA. During the summer watering my lawn uses more water than my entire household uses for everything else, even when we had 6 people living here. It is absolutely more than pennies unless she is just sprinkling a tiny area occasionally.

KrofftSurvivor −  NTA – he knows full well exactly how much water he & his wife are using – which is why he prefers to use somebody else’s water.
Keep an eye on that tap, and if it can be turned off from inside, do so. The first water bill you get after cutting off his access is still going to have some of his usage on it.. Bet the one after that is lower…

EducationalRoyal3880 −  He’s TA. He’s been freeloading off your water bill and is pissed that he’s no.longer getting away with it.
The muttering of ‘ I was just going to do something nice for you’ is a clear n**cissist tactic, designed only to disarm you.

_s1m0n_s3z −  It is unlikely that their hose was on your faucet by accident. NTA.

DesertSong-LaLa −  NTA – He’s diminishing the issue by stating it costs 3 cents. If true then he should be fine using water from his spigot. As a new owner your approach was fine since you are still learning the finer details of new home ownership.

To alleviate your concern of the first water bill, call the water company and ask what the bill is as of X date and based on your usage can they give you a ballpark number of what the 2-month bill will be?

Many allow you to log in and view your daily, weekly, monthly usage and will compare your 1st yr usage to your 2nd year usage (as time passes).Good neighbors are a godsend.Perhaps there will be a topic or good deed effort you can do to build a stronger relationship. Enjoy your new home!

DonnaPhillips01 −  NTA. You’re paying for your water, and it’s fair to want to protect your utility costs. If the faucet is connected to your meter, you have every right to ask your neighbor to stop using it.

Do you think the user was fair in asking their neighbor to stop using their water, or should they have let it slide given the minimal usage? How would you handle the situation if you were in their shoes? Share your thoughts below!