AITA for exposing my friend’s plastic surgery in front of her husband?’

A 30-year-old woman shared that during a gathering with a friend and her husband, an old photo surfaced showing her friend before plastic surgery. When the husband commented on how different she looked, the woman casually mentioned it was pre-surgery.

This revelation shocked the husband, who was unaware of his wife’s procedures, leading to an awkward atmosphere for the rest of the night. Afterward, the friend confronted the woman for exposing her, arguing that she had always been open about her surgery with others.

The woman felt she wasn’t at fault since her friend had not disclosed the truth to her husband and had invited her to view old photos without warning. The friend ended the call, expressing a desire to cut ties.

 

‘ AITA for exposing my friend’s plastic surgery in front of her husband?’

So I have a friend who when we were in college got some work done. It was known to everyone and she never had a problem sharing with people and giving them tips on who to go to, the aftermath and everything. We are now 30 and the whole friend group knows and whenever she meets new people she tells them (or so she told me).

Yesterday she invited me to her and her husband’s and we were playing some old video tapes and pictures of our memories and we were reminiscing the past and everything. Until a photo of her pre surgery appeared and her husband was like “oh she look so different” so I was like “oh it must’ve been pre surgery”. He was like “what surgery?”

I looked at him then at her then she tried to deflect the situation but the setting was awkward for the rest of the night. Apparently she dated him and married him but she lied about getting work done and he believed her. After I left he Ig demanded answers which forced her to say the truth.

She called me today saying I am the AH for exposing her but I was like “how could’ve known you lied to him when you are always upfront about it” like if she doesn’t mention it herself she expects me to mention it on her behalf to other people we meet…except her husband.

I also told her she invited me to view our old photos why didn’t she just give me heads up about it like she knew old photos pre surgery would appear.She hung up on me saying she doesn’t wanna know me anymore and that I am terrible secret keeper.

Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:

LemonFoam01 −  How can you keep a secret when it was never a secret to being with?. NTA.

LoveBeach8 −  NTA.The trouble with lying is trying to keep track of said lies. She has obviously known since before she married her husband that he doesn’t know and she doesn’t plan on telling him. She could have warned you and everyone but she didn’t.

In fact, she should have just told him the truth in the beginning, then the s**t wouldn’t hath hitteth the fan.

inFinEgan −  NTA. What sort of p**cho tells everyone about the work she had done and not her husband, and then doesn’t bother telling the people she knows that her husband doesn’t know and not to tell him. OP’s friend is the only a**hole here.

Schafer_Isaac −  NTA. Not your fault she tells the whole village but not her husband. Also *its not a secret if you tell everyone*. She’s an AH.

Complete-Turnip-9150 −  NTA I would have assumed the same as you that her husband knew about the plastic surgery. Seems odd that you would lie to your spouse about it

Feroshnikop −  “Am I the a**hole because my friend lied to her husband and didn’t keep me in the loop”. So clearly NTA lol.

MeanMeana −  You might as well tell us what surgeries she had done so we can understand how much of a shock he was in when he saw the old pic. Are we talking BBL, nose job, boobs?…or other stuff?

l3ex_G −  Nta she’s mad at herself and it’s easier to blame you than her. Honestly not a great trait in a friend. Clearly it would have come up with the old pictures so I think she probably felt guilty, wanted it to come out but didn’t want to pull the trigger.

Visual-Lobster6625 −  NTA – just as you said it yourself. How are you supposed to know that she lied to her husband? Has he never seen pictures of her when she was younger before? If everyone except him knew, he was bound to find out one day. How long have they been married?

He’s probably more upset that she told him a bold face lie rather than that she had surgery.

tombiowami −  NTA. Sounds like something else is in play…simple logic would have her telling you to keep it a secret or tell him. Or maybe he is psychotically against plastic surgery, which would be odd but who knows.

Is it fair to hold the woman accountable for mentioning something that her friend has openly discussed in the past, especially when it wasn’t clear she was keeping it a secret from her husband? How should friends navigate sensitive topics in relationships? Share your thoughts in the comments!